Intimacy: Today, I discovered my wife has been smoking weed for the past...

By Anonymous - 31/07/2009 15:10 - Australia

Today, I discovered my wife has been smoking weed for the past 2 years before she has sex with me. She said it was the only way she could force herself to have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 774

You deserved it 7 180

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Same thing different taste

Renewed energy

By Anonymous - 06/03/2025 14:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my wife has quit smoking weed. Now she can stay up all night, whereas before she fell asleep around 9 almost every night, so now I get absolutely no time to myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 227

You deserved it 392

It's not a competition, but still…

By Shooter71 - 16/10/2010 04:09 - France

Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 361

You deserved it 3 828

By Anonymous - 15/06/2014 19:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 159

You deserved it 6 393

By guest - 01/04/2011 21:33 - United States

Today, my wife decided that to help her stop smoking, she's also giving up the things that make her crave a cigarette. Sex is one of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 177

You deserved it 6 680

By SouthPaw - 14/01/2015 21:48 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, I confronted my wife because I thought the many hours a day she spends at a local coffee shop were so she could smoke. Turns out she's cheating on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 100

You deserved it 3 086

So frustrating!

By Marvin-jones - 02/03/2023 02:00

Today, my wife accused me of using her for sex. I'd only just admitted to her two days ago that I've been struggling to get it up to try and perform, after a hospital stay and a month of almost no sexual contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 095

You deserved it 137

Caught in 4K

By tanksfan - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - India

Today, after secretly smoking for more than two years, I decided to quit. I came home from work to see my wife holding a pack and asking me what was it doing behind the toilet seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 486

You deserved it 42 544

Was it worth it?

By Anonymous - 20/05/2025 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife has been super into sex lately, she even let me try some of the stuff she said no to before, and even surprised me with some of the kinky stuff she’s always wanted to try. Sounds great, right? Nope. Turns out she was overcompensating from the guilt of also fucking my coworker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 661

You deserved it 110

By rj - 12/05/2012 14:42 - United States - Goddard

Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 602

You deserved it 5 839

By Anonymous - 05/12/2010 01:28 - United States

Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 515

You deserved it 3 970

bittersweets 2

Friday 31 July 2009 20:06

on the other hand: how nice of her to think of your needs

calcboi 0

Friday 31 July 2009 20:07

Maybe it's because you're SO big you hurt her, and weed is the only thing that relaxes her enough to make the pain go away. Lolz.

Comments

angel19893 2

Monday 3 August 2009 8:29

aww you poor thing, thats so sad, I'm aussie and i certainly wouldnt do that to my husband...

nerdlover 0

Monday 3 August 2009 20:21

Maybe she has some sort of problem that causes sex to be painful for her(ie. my boyfriend has kidney cancer and has to smoke to dull the pain enough for us to do stuff) or past trauma that she can't help. Obviously she married you for a reason and why bother at all if she doesn't want to have sex with you. Stop worrying so much about your performance and talk to her about whats wrong instead of posting online like an insecure asshat.

DankJemo 0

Monday 3 August 2009 21:47

Well, the good news is your wife smokes weed... The bad news is you're so bad at it, that it's a requirement. Stop sucking at sex, it's not that hard!

xXxAlex666xXx 7

Thursday 6 August 2009 0:26

*lol

blueflame 2

Thursday 6 August 2009 4:52

You just found out? You really wouldn't have been able to smell it on her? Or tell that she was high? You're an idiot. I know I wouldn't be able to bring myself to have sex with an idiot either. But I do apologize if you have some sort of condition where you cannot smell. But at least you're getting laid?

Egghaus 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 19:28

WHAT THE ****!

rohkeus 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 6:54

Hey 125 (blueflame) learn something before you preach. It is ridiculously easy to hide the smell, if you even have to hide it at all. Her being high would be harder... but yeah. At least he didn't get his first kiss when he was 56...