Intimacy: Not now!

Not now!

By Victim - 27/06/2009 13:47 - United States

Today, at lifeguard class, I played a victim while my peers strapped me to the backboard in the water. When I was strapped down, I got wood in a wet swimsuit. My hands were strapped down so I could do nothing to hide it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 478

You deserved it 10 101

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Same thing different taste

By Higgs - 02/06/2009 19:10 - United States

Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 173

You deserved it 6 250

Baywatch

By Jenn - 16/12/2016 00:50

Today, in my lifeguarding course, I had to pull a 200-pound boy out of the pool in an exercise to practice using our legs when lifting. I, being only 90 pounds, tried pulling and ended up falling into the pool, landing with my lady parts on his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 244

You deserved it 849

By Anonymous - 11/06/2011 00:14 - United States

Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 462

You deserved it 7 726

By "mbrider" - 12/08/2017 16:00

Today, I saved a woman from drowning at a pool where I lifeguard, but when I got her out of the water she started screaming about sexual assault. Apparently I accidentally brushed her breasts when pulling her up and out of the water. She wants to sue me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 918

You deserved it 271

By Anonymous - 31/07/2014 05:00 - Australia - Darlinghurst

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 101

You deserved it 5 115

By Anonymous - 29/05/2012 18:43 - United States - Springfield

Today, while taking part in a lifeguarding exercise, I was supposed to "drown" to get another guard to save me. After all was done, my boss called me into his office and screamed at me for "drowning the wrong way," and threatening our reputation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 378

You deserved it 2 179

Looking cool

By Anonymous - 18/05/2014 04:48 - United States

Today, while lifeguarding, I slipped and fell from my chair and onto the cement. Embarrassed and actually quite hurt, I tried to climb back up to the chair, but it tipped. I fell half onto the cement half into the pool, just before the chair landed on top of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 880

You deserved it 6 094

By Anonymous - 22/05/2010 00:19 - United States

Today, at the pool, I tried to impress the hot lifeguard by doing the perfect dive. Afterward, I realized my shorts were floating through the water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 714

You deserved it 12 530

Sick moves, bro

By Fish - 19/03/2009 15:47 - United Arab Emirates

Today, we were hanging around the pool with a couple of friends and a crush of mine. Thinking I would be able to impress her with a well-performed dive off the diving board, I went up and attempted my best dive. I slipped as I jumped, hitting my head on the board. I had to be saved by the lifeguard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 309

You deserved it 55 394

By mytoehurts - 26/06/2015 13:09 - Canada - Ayr

Today, I was at my lifeguarding exam. Everything was going well until I went to 'save' someone and slipped and bellyflopped into the pool. I broke my toe, and the person I was supposed to save ended up saving me instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 437

You deserved it 2 884

shotgunner2 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 19:16

hahaha i hope the people tying you down were chicks in bikinis

seb12992 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 19:16

Ouch. Were you being strapped down by a group of hot girls?

Comments

G0ssipGangsta 0

Thursday 23 July 2009 1:17

Kinky.... I like it ;]

catherinee 0

Tuesday 28 July 2009 10:39

LOL FYL.

jdizzle1245 0

Wednesday 5 August 2009 7:19

yeah that sucks. its the worst when you have to give a presentation

jdizzle1245 0

Wednesday 5 August 2009 7:21

yeah that sucks. its the worst when you have to give a presentation

ms_brina 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 1:39

dude. that happened to a guy named nathan on my swim team. it was rather hilarius wen he got off the first place he put his hands were in front of himself. but i am sorry

x_tori_x 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 19:30

is this matt? haha cause if so i might have been there. :P

itzlegit_2 0

Sunday 15 November 2009 20:14

That's so funny. :P My classmate in NLS did that to. He was getting strapped in by two hot girls though. ;)

milise_fml 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 20:44

Aw, that must be embarassing. :( Me and my friends sail with some guys who all wear board shorts over their wetsuits! Hey presto, problem solved! :) They buy ones that are loose fitting and with an elastic and a string to tighten at the waist. :)

yellowgoggles 0

Saturday 2 January 2010 7:49

Ive been on the other side of this story, i was forced to strap down another guy while he pitched a tent on the backboard. Trust me, he may have been embarrassed, but i think i was the one that felt more awkward. in case you werent aware, there is a strap that goes right across the waistline...