Kids, Neighbours and Miscellaneous: Defense!

Defense!

By ruined_suit - 17/04/2009 21:12 - United States

Today, I came home from work to find that my neighbor's trash bins were still on the curb. While returning the bins to her backyard, her kid ran out and shot me with a paintball gun. Multiple times. He thought I was a burglar and ruined my new suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 129

You deserved it 7 136

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By signupsheetfail - 12/08/2009 19:02 - Canada

Today, I was doing target practice with my new paintball pistol. One of the bullets missed, and hit my new neighbor's house. I went up to the door to apologize, not realizing I was still holding the paintball gun. My ex-soldier neighbor thought I was robbing him and put me in a chokehold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 882

You deserved it 41 911

Get off my lawn!

By Anonymous - 29/08/2020 14:09

Today, the police came to my house and arrested me. Why? The neighborhood kids thought it would be fun to hide behind my house and shoot at people with paintball guns. People saw it coming from my house and called the police. I was fired from work, due to missing it without notice. No excuses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 138

You deserved it 112

By bettercallpeta - 15/02/2013 05:42 - United States

Today, I saw my neighbor's delinquent kid shooting squirrels with a BB gun. Shocked and furious at his cruel behavior, I told him to stop, with the threat of telling his parents. He responded by shooting me in the nuts and running away in a fit of laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 106

You deserved it 11 157

1, 2, 3… FIRE!

By Username - 11/08/2011 04:53 - United States

Today, I walked out of my house wearing only boxers, only to be greeted by kids with paintball guns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 000

You deserved it 15 265

By Anonymous - 12/01/2014 17:28 - United States - Sharon

Today, I was walking home from a horrible day at work, when some idiot emptied a trashcan on my head from his apartment balcony. He cried "Oh shit!" and apologized because I wasn't his intended target. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 746

You deserved it 3 734

By Anonymous - 30/04/2012 21:34 - United States

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 571

You deserved it 62 983

Sorry

By FailedSniper - 22/03/2011 16:31 - United States

Today, I saw my dad's friend across the street working on my neighbor's roof. To continue the airsoft war we'd been having, I shot at him with the sniper gun I'd bought. I hit him, and he fell off the roof. I ran over to see if he was OK. It wasn't my dad's friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 152

You deserved it 54 030

By no - 17/11/2014 02:26 - United States

Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 648

You deserved it 4 007

By iusedprotectionanyway - 21/03/2014 21:44 - New Zealand - Waitakere

Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 247

You deserved it 3 516

Kinda sus

By Anonymous - 08/03/2017 09:00 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, the new security guard of my apartment building tackled me for "suspicious behavior" while I was taking a bag full of dirty kitty litter to the trash chute. He broke my arm and cause the trash bag to explode. When I got back from the hospital, I was fined for littering in the hallway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 941

You deserved it 308

roll_fukng_tide 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 1:56

damn man. that does suck. my suggestion... get a paintball gun and have some fun of your own :p jk. dont do that.

caligal14 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 2:09

While I don't really know the whole story, but I do know that my neighbors are really nice and just the type of people that would put our trashcans or whatever back in our driveway if they blew away or we left them out, and we'd do the same for them, so... fyl.

Comments

somedouche 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 2:50

I realize that it's good to do something nice, but you deserve it.

RoadkillZoo 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 2:57

sue the family

saffrongirl 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 3:00

I feel sorry for everyone who voted YDI for this. And of course OP, FYL.

mrcarmine 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 3:02

#1, stop, maybe there's a cougar next door. haha and yeah, that's a badass little kid. too bad if the burglar had a gun, that badass little kid would be dead right now. (LOL #33)

Cyborg6060 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 3:05

Buddy, be grateful that the father doesn't own a shotgun.

Callyn 47

Saturday 18 April 2009 3:06

Do none of you people talk to your neighbors? This is the nice thing to do and the thing most people where I live would do. The kid's an ass.

ohhhhshizzz 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 3:06

I would hate to be any of you guys neighbors who said YDI. How? For being helpful. This guy is nice, so how could you say: "Don't touch shit that don't belong to you?" Really, wow a trash can. Bwahaha, I wouldn't be nice to those neighbors anymore. FML, indeed.

turtle131313 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 3:09

paintballs wash out, just get it dry-cleaned they should be able to get it out

asdfghi 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 3:27

yep thankfully some people know paintballs wash out, and lets be honest if you got hit with real paint (not the paintball stuff) it would still probably wash out if you put it anywhere near water within like 5 min. i talk to my neighbors all the time but if i was a young child and saw someone walking through my back yard i would freak out as well...and lets be honest the average burglar is scared already, getting shot by anything that stings the slightest bit would make them run.