Sex, Awkward and Intimacy: Booming

Booming

By Anonymous - 26/04/2013 22:22 - United States - Arvada

Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 970

You deserved it 10 228

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Same thing different taste

By MulticoloredSlug - 13/10/2016 10:57 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated. We were having a lot of fun until I decided I wanted to be on top. He instantly got soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 464

You deserved it 1 428

Noob

By lameows - 04/04/2015 01:57 - United States

Today, things got heated with my boyfriend for the first time. Turns out he's even more inexperienced than I thought; when I started grinding against him, he frowned and said, "Um... why're you doing that? We've still got clothes on..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 556

You deserved it 4 412

Caveman fetish

By Anonymous - 18/08/2022 21:58

Today, my boyfriend lost his temper at me for the first time ever after 2 years of dating, and actually raised his voice. It turned me on, and I don’t just mean on, I mean OOONNNNNN. I was so wet it ran down my thighs and made an obvious damp spot in my jeans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 545

You deserved it 1 144

By gettinghotinhere - 17/10/2014 18:29 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I climbed onto my boyfriend's lap and sexily told him "It's getting hot in here," and started unbuttoning my shirt. He said "Oh," pushed me off him, and went to turn the ceiling fan on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 844

You deserved it 6 886

By Anonymous - 10/02/2012 05:31 - United States

Today, things were getting hot with my boyfriend and I started to breathe heavy and moan. He then says to me, "Babe, can you calm down, we're having sex not running a marathon." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 999

You deserved it 7 292

So sensual...

By Wellokthen - 17/02/2017 22:00 - United States

Today, things began to get hot and heavy between my boyfriend and me. Suddenly, in a deep, sexy voice, he whispered, "God help me for what I'm about to do." Thinking it was just an odd manner of dirty talk, I mumbled about liking it. He then farted very loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 134

You deserved it 1 178

By sarajj - 29/03/2013 21:36 - United States - Littleton

Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 727

You deserved it 9 316

By princess - 12/04/2014 21:01 - United States - San Marcos

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky, and I whispered that I love him. He immediately lost his boner, and a few minutes later "remembered" he had to be somewhere else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 617

You deserved it 7 177

It happens to the best of us

By unsatisfied - 01/02/2010 00:20 - United States

Today, things heated up with the new guy I've been seeing for a couple of weeks, he kept saying things like "I want you so bad" and "it's going to take hours" to the point that I was so hot, I decided to go for it. Apparently he has "a problem sometimes" getting it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 833

You deserved it 3 940

That was quick

By Anonymous - 09/09/2012 12:03 - United States - Altamonte Springs

Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 595

You deserved it 6 839

otecasacid 22

Saturday 27 April 2013 4:48

Would it kill you to be a little frisky? I'm sure you do things during sex that aren't always to be considered attractive.

limitedition 25

Saturday 27 April 2013 4:52

That's pretty minor compared to what it could have been.

Comments

Steve95401 49

Saturday 27 April 2013 5:21

It has risen indeed.

iammeorami 25

Saturday 27 April 2013 5:23

He could of been parting the Red Sea....

FlyingPie 17

Saturday 27 April 2013 5:28

Period sex? I might go throw up now..

anxietydisorderz 6

Saturday 27 April 2013 11:25

Ewww!

MissLeslie 0

Saturday 27 April 2013 5:41

It wouldn't kill the mood so much as I'd start laughing hysterically.

AlexiAwesome 10

Saturday 27 April 2013 5:50

Just role play

songtrees 8

Saturday 27 April 2013 6:14

He sounds hilarious. You are lucky to have found a man with a great sense of humor.

BananerzFresh 12

Saturday 27 April 2013 6:19

I would have laughed it off.

marlenoysis 7

Saturday 27 April 2013 6:21

Well you're no fun!!

Mimitrixie 11

Saturday 27 April 2013 7:06

You have no idea how hard I'm laughing right now!

TheWorldGreatest 8

Saturday 27 April 2013 7:19

Sometimes men don't have a clue about ,trying to please a women! Very selfish boys they are !

Marmarfarfar 25

Saturday 27 April 2013 7:32

I am pretty sure it rising is a good thing...

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The Top

Today, I purchased a cactus in a cute little pot and put it on my windowsill so it could get sun. Unfortunately, that's also where I have my alarm clock. Guess which one I grabbed in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 243

You deserved it 2 706

Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 940

You deserved it 5 529

Today, I met my boyfriend's entire extended family at a party. All of them, including his dad, said I looked exactly like his mum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 980

You deserved it 481

Today, after weeks of quarantine, I can finally go to the hospital to get my haemorrhoid surgery, which was confirmed. I have a big internal one. I didn't not consult with the same doctor as before, but he didn't even do a check up inside and told me, "You have nothing, go home." I can't shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 719

You deserved it 186

Today, I got bitten by my aunt's dog. My brother was holding the leash. He said he didn't pull the dog away from me because he didn't want to rip my shirt. Meanwhile, the dog was biting a penny-sized chunk out of my hip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 099

You deserved it 2 797

Today, while on the bus, an old man told me about all the many things he wanted to do with my various orifices. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 207

You deserved it 2 712