Dogs Love Blame the pooch

Blame the pooch

anamota89 - 11/05/2012 09:33 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

silentbutdeadly - 27/04/2009 22:04 - United States

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. His dog, Baxter, has a bad farting problem. I decided it would be okay to let a silent fart out and blame the dog. Baxter was outside when I blamed him. FML

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Anonymous - 11/09/2012 19:16 - Sweden - Guayanilla

Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML

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Oops - 23/05/2010 09:21 - Australia

Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML

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TrulyYours - 07/05/2009 12:39 - United States

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone. After a short pause I hear him say "I love you." Smiling I say, "I love you too." Then he says, "I was talking to my dog." FML

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ShitHappens - 24/10/2011 05:04 - United States

Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML

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Tension

Anonymous - 06/04/2011 11:47 - Netherlands

Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said, "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML

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StinkyandStupid - 15/03/2012 17:49 - United States

Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML

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fartlover - 27/11/2009 05:10 - Canada

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML

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BadBreath - 09/04/2009 03:43 - United States

Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch, crying, when my dog came up on the couch to console me. I was thinking about how great it was to have a dog, because they're there for you when no one else is. As I was sobbing, I heard something. My dog farted into my mouth. Twice. FML

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byebyeromance - 26/08/2014 01:03 - United States - State College

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

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notsorandomguy 18

Friday 11 May 2012 16:15

What's wrong with a plain old "What? What are you talking about"? Is it too mainstream?

ddeathbombb 5

Friday 11 May 2012 16:13

Do you have a cat lol

bubu93_fml 1

Saturday 12 May 2012 1:58

lmao! girl i wud have told him brb and qone to the bathroom to fart.haha

uumlaut_strohson 3

Saturday 12 May 2012 2:04

now he knows you can let rip. when you're with him next light one up - flame on baby!

thecovert 7

Saturday 12 May 2012 2:08

See, it WAS the dog. Just so you know.

linkinpark98 23

Saturday 12 May 2012 2:46

Tell him it was a ghost boy.

mustangkid21 0

Saturday 12 May 2012 3:34

Could of told him your butt saud hi!

thatoneguy79 10

Saturday 12 May 2012 4:24

OP - Next time that happens, explain to your boyfriend that the ninja Noor snuck into your room with a ketchup bottle. He won't be able to disprove it.

wolfgirl18 3

Saturday 12 May 2012 7:10

Why didn't you just put your phone on mute?

mckibabe 7

Saturday 12 May 2012 9:55

That's when you say, yah wasn't it loud? Probably a 9 right?!

stevenmx86 7

Saturday 12 May 2012 17:03

Yeah, everyone listen to 145 aka SquirtingPonies, obviously the epitome of class...

Lillebrune 7

Saturday 12 May 2012 19:11

Why is it so horrible for most girls to fart in front of their boyfriends? Thankfully my bf and i are so friendly with each other that we do everything in the other's compagny. even ******** in the toilet. we dont care...