Argument

How could you?

By Anon - 25/07/2022 06:00

Today, after screaming at me this morning, my wife has been giving me the silent treatment. We're trying to get pregnant, but she caught me masturbating, or "reducing my sperm count on purpose" as she called it. I just wanted some harmless fun with some porn, since getting pregnant has made actual sex a chore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 461

You deserved it 601

Give me a break

By anon - 18/02/2023 06:00

Today, I burned dinner because my girlfriend was yelling for me to help with a trivial problem. To salvage things, I ordered pizza. She spent the rest of the evening moaning that I ruined dinner, that we don't eat healthy, and that I "make us" waste money on food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 206

Hammerhead

By I tried - 23/10/2022 14:00 - United States

Today, I had to listen to my classmate loudly argue a question she got wrong on a test for half an hour, repeating the same incorrect argument ad nauseam. She screamed at the rightfully exasperated teacher for being "biased" when he gave up, and started screaming again when I tried to explain it in a different way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 906

You deserved it 132

Groundhog Day

By Anonymous - 19/12/2023 09:00 - United States

Today, my brother and his girlfriend are fighting about something they agreed on YEARS ago. Every couple of months this argument comes back and his girlfriend changes the rules or the definition. I can’t believe she gonna become my sister-in-law. FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 116

Thanksgiving? I hate it!

By Philomena - 28/11/2024 14:00 - United States - Birmingham

Today, it's Thanksgiving and I've spent the last few days imploring my husband not to antagonize my Trump-loving family by talking about the fact that they didn't look into what tariffs were at the time, and now they might have to close their business. Wish me luck… FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 277

Modesty

By Prudemama - 09/07/2022 10:00

Today, I found out that my 11 year-old daughter dresses skimpy when I drop her off on the weekends at my ex-husband’s house, courtesy of his girlfriend, who he cheated on me with. When I confronted her, she told me to “stop being such a prude” and with my attitude, “no wonder you get cheated on.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 948

You deserved it 191

Reasonable

By Anonymous - 10/07/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, my wife and I have been fighting and she's accusing me of being too controlling because I absolutely forbid her from putting pictures of our kids on social media. FML

I agree, your life sucks 470

You deserved it 185

Superficial

By where's the logic? - 25/12/2022 09:00

Today, my girlfriend and I are fighting because I refuse to buy a new car. Apparently, I should put myself balls-deep in debt instead of hunting for a bargain, because it's "embarrassing" for me to buy a used car. This coming from the woman who tries to reuse bath water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 153

You deserved it 173

Costly spat

By brokeandsad - 03/01/2010 20:21 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight about a clogged toilet. He was yelling about not having enough money to buy a better plunger and so I stormed out to buy one myself. While pulling his truck into traffic, a car hit me causing $1000 in damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 608

You deserved it 9 631

Happy Anniversary!

By Anonymous - 29/06/2021 06:00

Today, it was my first anniversary with my husband. Not only were we mad at each other and not speaking the whole day, he doesn't even remember and spent the night out with his friends instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 892

You deserved it 304

Think globally

By Bloody tears - 27/05/2026 00:00 - Netherlands - Naaldwijk

Today, my husband got so worked up in an argument that his blood pressure spiked and he burst a vein in his eyeball. He was arguing with a guy on the internet, trying to convince him that Donald Trump is evil. We're not even American. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 187

Emergencies can't be choosers

By Anonymous - 20/07/2022 12:00 - United States

Today, my mom argued with me that I should have went to an emergency room a further 18 minutes away from me, during a near fatal allergic reaction, so I would've received "better care." FML

I agree, your life sucks 893

You deserved it 88

That escalated quickly

By Anonymous - 04/10/2021 14:00

Today, my wife and I have been fighting for two days straight. We haven’t talked all day. It all started with me asking where to park. FML

I agree, your life sucks 943

You deserved it 124

TikTok trending

By Anonymous - 18/06/2023 18:00

Today, my girlfriend insisted on doing some stupid TikTok where we say one thing we’d change about each other. She hates that I don’t always put plates straight in the dishwasher. I hate that she gets her makeup all over the sink without cleaning it. She got mad and threw a book at my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 902

You deserved it 177

By detour165 - 26/12/2013 05:30 - Australia - Ascot Vale

Today, while staying at my brother's place for the Christmas holidays, I had to leave because he threatened to "take me outside". Apparently he doesn't like being corrected on whether a certain car has a long wheel base version, so I guess the family Christmas is over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 825

You deserved it 3 735

Argument ender

By Anonymous - 14/10/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I was arguing with my girlfriend when my dog brought me a squeaky toy and tried shoving it into my hand so I could throw it for him. Out of habit, I grabbed it, but then it squeaked every time I tried to make a serious point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 435

The best part of breaking up…

By Anonymous - 19/10/2009 23:51 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 105

You deserved it 8 872

By Nomoresandwish - 29/11/2009 08:55 - United States

Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 267

You deserved it 13 517

Facebook drama

By fistycunt4 - 06/12/2014 20:22 - United States - Belmont

Today, I posted a picture of me without makeup on Facebook. A "friend" commented, "fuk me thts hideus!!" My dad replied, "Hideous, yes, just like your godawful spelling!" My mom yelled at my dad for agreeing with the guy, and they're still fighting. Meanwhile, my self-esteem is in the gutter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 347

You deserved it 3 792

Classic power move

By Anonymous - 15/02/2025 22:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I tried to make a dramatic exit after arguing with my sibling. I slammed the front door behind me, only to realize my hoodie string was stuck in it. I had to awkwardly knock and ask to be let back in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123

You deserved it 457

Gold digger

By Anonymous - 26/05/2023 06:00 - United States - Moscow

Today, I asked my boyfriend to help me with groceries, since the last of my money went to last week's groceries. His response was to start a fight, then tell me it's my fault my daughter acts the way she does, which is when he finally got me to break down and cry. I'm pregnant with his kid, and I also pay 90% of our bills. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 027

You deserved it 1 012

Double standard

By Anonymous - 18/08/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, I realized I sacrificed all my friends to make sure my marriage was successful, but sometimes when under extreme stress from my wife, I use the B-word and that’s enough for her to want to leave me. However, it’s perfectly fine for her to say "Fuck you" and that I’m a everything but a decent human being. FML

I agree, your life sucks 295

You deserved it 482

So annoying

By Anonymous - 11/12/2021 11:01

Today, my girlfriend and I were arguing. I told her that "same" and "similar" were two different words that meant two different things. She said, "I don't know about that, let me research it." This is the level of, "I always need to be right" that I deal with every day. I need to end things, for both of our sakes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 922

You deserved it 320

Emotional support

By Anonymous - 10/01/2022 17:01

Today, I went to the emergency room with my boyfriend, only to sit there for 3 hours waiting for him to be seen, then having an argument with him about how impatient I am because they never called his name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 505

You deserved it 948

Pure evil

By Anonymous - 28/11/2023 00:00

Today, my son got in an argument with my boyfriend, packed up his stuff, and moved in with his dad. Not five minutes later I saw my boyfriend doing his stupid happy dance. When angrily confronted, he admitted he orchestrated every argument for months until he got the result he wanted, my son gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 1 144

Hypocrisy

By Anonymous - 07/06/2022 00:01 - United States

Today, my sister's boyfriend dumped her after a huge fight they had, regarding him getting a haircut without talking to her first. I asked if she also needed to consult with him first before getting a haircut. Without a hint of self-awareness, she said, "Of course not. That's stupid. Why would I need his permission?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 448

You deserved it 179

The happiest place on Earth

By Anonymous - 27/05/2022 00:01

Today, we were supposed to go to Disneyland but we got in a blazing argument. Then this morning I woke up to my alarm clock disabled, he was gone, my ticket was in the kitchen shredded, and when I rang him the bastard was in the first class lounge, waiting to get on the plane without me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 278

Thatcher, Thatcher, jungle canyon rope bridge snatcher!

By great idea - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Canada - Calgary

Today, my social studies teacher thought it would be a great idea to have a casual debate about Margaret Thatcher and her legacy. Within 10 minutes, the entire class was yelling, screaming, throwing stuff at each other. I got hit in the face with a binder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 876

You deserved it 3 988

Hiding something?

By Carolina - 16/08/2023 14:00

Today, my husband threw an epic tantrum about how “men are allowed to have female friends”, smashed stuff in the living room, for him to storm out and slam the door, making the house tremble. All I did was tell him that his friendship with his secretary made me uncomfortable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 963

You deserved it 228

Sharing is caring

By T…… - 15/10/2023 00:02

Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit because I snatched a couple of her fries for myself. She regularly raids my snacks, takes food off my plate, and has even stolen my work lunches, but a couple of fries is too much to ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 750

You deserved it 150

FML on Facebook

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The Top

Today, I started an awesome job with competitive pay. I also found out that the place is closing its doors in June. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 495

You deserved it 2 693

Today, the girl I've been dating asked me to describe her body. I said "Thin an toned but curvy in all the right places." I then asked her the same question to which she replied, "I don't know, you know I'm always drunk when we're together." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 496

You deserved it 4 631

Today, my daughter's guinea pig got stuck behind the wardrobe, squeaking its head off. I tried pulling the wardrobe towards me to free him, but couldn't take the weight of it all, so it fell over, smashing the TV. The guinea pig is fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 898

You deserved it 7 351

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking in my backyard. All I was wearing were my boxers and one sock. I staggered up to see my car halfway through my garage wall, with a note saying, "Sorry dude". FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 381

You deserved it 42 574

Today, my newborn son is only four days-old. My in-laws have been over five times already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 819

You deserved it 288

Today, I excitedly told my best friends I was pregnant. Their responses were, "Ewww, I hate babies", "So we're not getting brunch anymore? That sucks" and "Do you need an abortion? I know a great clinic." Not one of them congratulated me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 103

You deserved it 325