Health Today, I accidentally deep throated a fork. FML

CaoiiBieber - 17/07/2011 19:15 - Ireland

Today, I accidentally deep throated a fork. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Hangry dude

Anonymous - 07/08/2021 20:01

Today, I accidentally bit so hard on my fork that I cracked my tooth. FML

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Nick - 11/02/2010 18:35 - United States

Today, I was carrying a hot cup of noodles. I sneezed and accidentally stabbed myself in the forehead with a fork. FML

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8sq - 11/06/2011 01:32 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that yes, a fork can get stuck in your braces. FML

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Anonymous - 04/03/2016 16:47 - United States - Suwanee

Today, I had so much skin peeling off my lips that it got caught in my fork as I was eating. FML

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Crunchy

Anonymous - 26/04/2025 22:00 - United States - Benson

Today, I was running late for work, so I grabbed a cheap sandwich from a gas station. As I rushed to take a bite, I bit into something unexpectedly hard. I thought it was a tough bit of bacon, or some sort of nut, but realized it was a small plastic fork that had been helpfully hidden inside my sandwich. I'd already swallowed half of it. FML

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Introvert struggles

knife knife - - United Kingdom - Dalkeith

Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML

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M2thaM - 29/05/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, I was trying to flirt with the guy I like using body language, so I leaned over this counter in a sensual way. I happened to have a fork, so I went to bite the tip that sexy way people do in movies. I accidentally stabbed myself in the lip, cutting it. My lunch had jalapeños in it. FML

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Anonymous - 22/05/2019 00:01

Today, a fork hit me in the eye. I was holding it. I didn't even get to eat my chicken. FML

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lectro - 23/11/2008 08:22 - France

Today, I swallowed the piercing that I had bought for my tongue yesterday. FML

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Anonymous - 11/07/2013 17:08 - United States - Fresno

Today, I was eating a corndog, when my boyfriend jokingly told me to "take it deeper". I did, and ended up choking and throwing up all over the table. FML

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JayBear14 11

Monday 18 July 2011 0:25

how does that work?

Captain_Obvious2_fml 6

Monday 18 July 2011 0:58

i had trouble clicking this...

Miranday 0

Monday 18 July 2011 3:03

You're doing it wrong.

brianjman14 22

Monday 18 July 2011 3:03

Did it cum?

cbou 0

Monday 18 July 2011 3:36

Practice makes perfect.

Wirbelwind 2

Monday 18 July 2011 3:37

how do you 'accidentally' deep throat a fork? o.0

Monkeyone 0

Monday 18 July 2011 3:39

Gross.

soulfulemo 0

Monday 18 July 2011 3:45

accidentally.... er, how?

inkblotdrummer 6

Monday 18 July 2011 3:55

lol use a condiment.

RadioActive1022 9

Monday 18 July 2011 3:58

Did the back of your throat itch?

MikeHuntIsTight 0

Monday 18 July 2011 4:06

me next

SarahMae2014 10

Monday 18 July 2011 4:12

how do you accidently deep throught a fork?????

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Today, I found out that my older sister is sleeping with my adopted son. They both say it’s fine because he’s 22 and they’re not blood related, but I just can’t get over that she’s sleeping with my son, and is old enough to be his grandmother. FML

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Today, I found out that my hearing is average for a 60-year-old. I'm 30. FML

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Today, my mom insisted on making my lunch. She didn't know that knives are banned at my high school, and packed me a steak knife for cream cheese. I'm now suspended for 7 days, and she refuses to say that she did anything wrong. FML

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Today, my dad sent me back and forth repeatedly to the auto parts store for a replacement headlight bulb. He kept insisting that what I brought back was the wrong bulb. I had to drag him there to show I was getting the right one by asking the clerk. He's wrong, but is mad at me for embarrassing him in front of the staff. FML

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Today, I spoke to my ex again for the first time after our breakup. The first words out of his mouth were, "I love you, so I'm going to have to confess some things in the hopes that my honesty will help us get back together." It didn't, but it does mean I have to get tested now. FML

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