Parents

Custody

By Anonymous - 07/06/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, I regret letting my adoptive daughter find her biological father because now he's intent on getting her back. He said he never agreed to giving her up for adoption and will do everything in his power to get her. She's terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 434

You deserved it 74

Somebody's watching

By KANE LIVES - 06/06/2026 22:00 - Switzerland - Zurich

Today, my son told me he liked a girl, so I asked if they were friends. He said no, he's never spoken to her, but he watches her in class and follows her around. When I told him that was fucking creepy, my wife yelled at me. My kid is a stalker and my wife thinks it's cute. God help me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 441

You deserved it 69

Jailbird

By Anonymous - 06/06/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I asked my foster parents to adopt me. They said no because my dad's getting out of prison soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 456

You deserved it 51

Bio mom situation is insane

By Anonymous - 02/06/2026 20:00 - United States - Perris

Today, my foster son’s adoption is once again being delayed thanks to his crackhead birth mom. Every time she gets a notice that we’re moving forward, she has some rando come forward pretending to be the bio dad, then we have to go through months of court and DNA tests. She’s done this 12 times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 459

You deserved it 41

I'm the father who stepped up

By Anonymous - 02/06/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, my parents started nagging me yet again to have kids. When I pointed out that I already do, they scoffed and said that my five step-kids don't count. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 78

Just a dream…

By alaska - 30/05/2026 03:00 - United States - Aurora

Today, I had a dream that my mom hugged me and told me she loved me. I woke up to her banging on my door, barging into my room, inspecting it, and then telling me to “just fucking kill yourself, because you're genuinely a bad person” before slamming my door. My room was perfectly clean and tidy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 589

You deserved it 68

Mom of the year

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, my mother sat me down and told me, "I'm not going to lie, I hate living with you. Please get a job and move out." I'm 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 499

You deserved it 313

Body issues

By Anonymous - 27/05/2026 09:00 - South Africa - Brakpan

Today, while I'm in the depths of postpartum blues and insecurities, my grandmother in-law gifted me a size 22 pair of jeans that does not fit her. I'm a size 12. I started crying and fake choked so that nobody would notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 360

You deserved it 86

No kidding

By Minding my own biz - 26/05/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, at brunch, a friend started talking about wanting kids. The table immediately turned into a debate about whether having children is selfish, noble, irresponsible, or “bad for the planet.” The waiter came back 3 times asking if we were ready to order, while 8 adults argued over the future of humanity next to untouched eggs Benedict. FML

I agree, your life sucks 282

You deserved it 132

Like father, like son

By I'm dad - 26/05/2026 12:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, after making fun of my dad for years because he falls asleep in front of the TV every night by 9:30, I sat down “just for a minute” after work and woke up at 2 a.m. fully dressed, lights on, with Netflix asking if I was still watching, and a half-eaten wrap stuck to my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107

You deserved it 434

Fine, stay there!

By Anonymous - 24/05/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, my punishment for my 14 year-old troublemaker son seems to have badly backfired. My husband and I sent him to live with my strict disciplinarian father for a while, and not only has he changed, but he loves it there and refuses to come home. My dad is on his side. I don't know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 561

Dementia?

By Anonymous - 24/05/2026 00:00 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, my dad called me a pussy and said I wasn't a real man, simply because I hugged and kissed my son and told him that I loved him. It gets even better though. My dad was openly affectionate and loving to me when I was a kid, then somewhere along the line, he became this horrible person. Can't go no contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 71

Bad grandma

By Anonymous - 21/05/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, I'm grounded for literally the whole summer because my parents found out that I was still seeing my grandma behind their backs, even though they banned her from ever seeing us again after she spanked my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 127

I can't get behind that

By Anonymous - 20/05/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, my whole family turned on me because I absolutely refused to attend my son's wedding, even though he really wanted me to walk him down the aisle. He married the woman he cheated on his ex-wife with, and abandoned their kids. That's why I refused to attend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 561

You deserved it 84

Uprooted

By Anonymous - 19/05/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, my parents said that we're moving back to Los Angeles. I'm so fucking pissed off because in the couple of years since we moved to a tiny town, I've become a different person and love my new life. This is just completely undoing everything I've been through and they won't let me move in with my new best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 94

Dazed and confused

By AnastasiyaNicholas - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my drunken mother woke up after having passed out and yelled at me for ditching school. It took half an hour to explain that it's 5:00, and I've already been to school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 123

You deserved it 2 094

Mother's Day is sacred

By Anonymous - 13/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I woke up to a note from my wife, saying that since I spent Father's Day golfing, she booked herself a spa day, so I could take care of our 4 kids and the house like she does every day. She ignored every single one of my calls and didn't even tell me what spa she went to. What mother does that to her family? FML

I agree, your life sucks 107

You deserved it 1 544

Wonky birthday!

By Anonymous - 13/05/2026 00:00 - United Kingdom - Bournemouth

Today, halfway through assembling a toy kitchen for a birthday, I realized the instructions made no sense and half the screws looked identical. I still somehow finished it and felt triumphant until the kid opened the oven door, the whole thing tipped sideways, and I had to spend the rest of the party holding it together with one hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 149

You deserved it 313

Quite the ask

By Anonymous - 10/05/2026 20:00 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, my parents cut ties with me because I refused to drop out of college and move five states away with them for a "fresh start" after the deaths of my siblings. I basically lost my whole family in the span of just two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 585

You deserved it 57

Oddly specific

By Anonymous - 06/05/2026 00:00 - United States - Arlington

Today, I have no choice but to move back in with my mom and her husband, who are still married even though he's responsible for the house fire that killed my two younger brothers in 2013. FML

I agree, your life sucks 516

You deserved it 77

Step-nothing

By Anonymous - 05/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, my dad's new wife, who is two years younger than me (I'm 24) and hates that I'm a lesbian, threw a fit when I told her that I would never call her Mom. My dad took her side. I don't live with them but still… FML

I agree, your life sucks 512

You deserved it 92

Overfamiliar

By Anonymous - 03/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I felt comfortable enough to finally call my stepmom "Mom." She politely asked me not to call her that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 503

You deserved it 73

Late to the party

By Anonymous - 29/04/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, my ex-husband, who abandoned us after our son was paralyzed in an accident, contacted me to demand full custody because he found out that I got remarried. He doesn't want another man raising his son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 622

You deserved it 81

Mommy needs a break

By Anonymous - 29/04/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, my husband and I had a huge fight because I booked us on an adults-only Virgin Voyages cruise for our anniversary. I love him, but he wants every single vacation to be a family vacation with our kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 208

Time to chime in

By Women don't owe men shit - 23/04/2026 09:00 - Poland - Warsaw

Today, I heard my husband giving my son the talk about girls. He said, "You want three main things from women: peace, sex, and kids. If they can't give you those, they aren't worth your time." What an asshole I married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 320

Intentional?

By Libris Mortis - 23/04/2026 03:00 - United States - New York

Today, I intentionally caused my parents to have an intensely heated argument when I asked them how and where they first met. Dad said it was at a funeral, and mom said it was at a burial. FML

I agree, your life sucks 185

You deserved it 272

Anger management

By Anonymous - 19/04/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, my parents tried to apologize for wrongly grounding me. I told them to go fuck themselves, so now I'm re-grounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 766

Dynasty

By Anonymous - 17/04/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, my grandparents are demanding that I come live with them because my stepmom is pregnant. They're convinced that she and my dad are going to throw me aside once the baby is born, even though I know that's not going to happen. They're even making threats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 344

You deserved it 60

The Unmatchmaker

By Anonymous - 16/04/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, my parents found out that I separately convinced them not to get back together, and now they're not speaking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89

You deserved it 639

Don't blame me!

By Anonymous - 15/04/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, my parents told me they're getting a divorce because of all the strain caused by me nearly dying in an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 515

You deserved it 58

FML on Facebook

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The Top

Today, I accidentally broke an expensive glass display shelf at work. My coworker joked, "Ooh, that's gonna come out of your paycheck!" My boss thought that was a great idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 456

You deserved it 3 028

Today, I have an eight hour transatlantic flight and the person sitting next to me has already filled his third sick bag. This wouldn't be quite so bad were we not still at the terminal with passengers still boarding the plane. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 947

You deserved it 2 526

Today, we had an office party and everyone had to dress as a dead star. I love Michael Jackson so I dressed up as him. It turns out I looked more like my boss than Michael. I was then written up for "theoretically" killing my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 692

You deserved it 185

Today, I once again bought condoms at the gas station to make the people who work there think that I have a sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 412

You deserved it 1 405

Today, I was going to ask out a girl I work with, only to find out that not only is she in a relationship, she’s also a lesbian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 566

You deserved it 253

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend when she said, "Babe, I'm not trying to be rude but your cum tastes horrible." I didn't know how to respond so I said, "Okay." Apparently, me saying that means i won't try to make my cum taste better, which I can "definitely do", and now she's mad at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 457

You deserved it 304