Miscellaneous: Help!

Help!

By Anonymous - 09/11/2009 09:12 - Canada

Today, I went to a petting zoo to take pictures. I look down to see a goat chewing the sleeve of my new sweater, so as I reached down to get it loose, it started eating my hair. People took pictures of me wrestling the goat before they helped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 103

You deserved it 3 825

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Same thing different taste

Hangry

By JoanT - 20/10/2020 11:08

Today, while petting one of the goats we have, the other one was jealous so it ripped out a chunk of my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 983

You deserved it 207

That's a thing

By Anon - 13/11/2023 00:02 - United States

Today, my friend thought it'd be a great idea to drag me a new fitness trend - goat yoga. Mid-session, the goat had a nibble on my hair, and I ended up having to do a downward dog while trying to dodge a very friendly but mischievous farm animal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 189

You deserved it 361

By Nomoreballs - 10/07/2012 23:10 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I went to an amusement park with my ex in the hopes of re-kindling our relationship. While taking a break at the petting zoo, I got rammed in the balls by a goat. She laughed and patted the goat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 758

You deserved it 6 449

Don't feed the animals

By Anonymous - 19/03/2023 14:00

Today, I took my kids to the petting zoo and my toddler decided to feed the goats her entire bag of popcorn. The goats swarmed her and stole her shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 693

You deserved it 552

By aaa - 01/03/2011 15:00

Today, I learned that it's cute when a goat comes up to you and licks your face. That is, until you realize that goat was just eating poison ivy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 881

You deserved it 5 786

Pet this!

By shando - 08/11/2009 02:13 - United States

Today, I went to a petting zoo with my niece and nephew. While we were checking out the llamas, one of them spit directly into my face. Disgusted and embarrassed, we turned away to pet a deer. The deer immediately urinated then shook its tail, which splattered it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 612

You deserved it 3 585

Tasty treat

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Crystal Lake

Today, my family and I went to feed carrots to the giraffes at the zoo. After I finished my first cup of carrots, I turned back to get some more. Suddenly, I was jerked back and a chunk of my hair was ripped out. The giraffe mistook the orange barrette in my hair for a carrot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 028

You deserved it 10 806

Pranked, level 2000

By Poopyhead - 08/11/2009 19:14 - Ireland

Today, I was at a petting zoo with my boyfriend. A guy that worked there said he'd take a picture of me with a mouse on my head. He reassured me that this mouse was trained. I agreed. Once the mouse got on my head, it peed. Turns out the guy didn't work there after all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 757

You deserved it 15 744

Beware!

By MomOfTheYear - 28/04/2025 03:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I took my toddler to a petting zoo and warned her not to stick her fingers in the goat pen. Two minutes later, I stuck my finger in to pet one, and it bit me. She looked me dead in the eyes and said, “See? I told you.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 78

You deserved it 651

By Anonymous - 22/10/2014 17:37 - United States - Allen

Today, I got my graduation photos back. I'd sent them to a friend for touching up, but unfortunately we had a major argument recently. I guess that's why in the photos I've been photoshopped out and replaced with a goat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 786

You deserved it 7 264

repyourcliche 0

Monday 9 November 2009 16:18

WWE here you come.

n0lovesongs 0

Monday 9 November 2009 16:25

What the hell is up with all these petting zoo fml's lately? It's like there was some kind of fml gathering or something....

Comments

SusanaSaysRawrxD 0

Monday 9 November 2009 17:18

What's with all the zoo FMLs lately? Almost every other FML is zoo/zoo animal related now. It's kind of odd. o_0

joey1707 0

Monday 9 November 2009 17:19

What's up with all the petting zoo FMLs?

doodles88 0

Monday 9 November 2009 17:49

tell me about it!

Peroxide 3

Monday 9 November 2009 17:20

Goatse?

perdix 29

Monday 9 November 2009 19:08

Thanks for bringing that image back into my mind. I had been successfully repressing it for years. It took Goatse to push the disturbing imagery of felching out of my mind, and then it took "Two Girls, One Cup" and blumpkins to shove Goatse into the dark corners of my brain. Now, they are all running loose in my mind! *gack*

Person1233 12

Monday 9 November 2009 22:04

Once I went on to my computer and found goatse as my background. Damn my sister, now it's BURNED into my mind.

PandaPandaPandaX 0

Tuesday 10 November 2009 13:20

Wow that's quite the vicious circle you have going. What will it take me to rid myself of these images, the options you chose have been used in my case :/ Gah!

perdix 29

Monday 9 November 2009 17:32

See, you Canadians ARE really as polite as the legends say you are. They actually helped after picture-taking. We Americans would stand there and watch as the match of Sweater Girl vs. the Goat reached its logical conclusion. If it got to a goat-humping stage, we would have made you a YouTube superstar.