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zwalixx

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zwalixx

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 3 May 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 482
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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zwalixx's page activity

Visits<b>duckman9</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 2:23pm<b>Dodopy</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 10:50pm

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zwalixx's favorite FMLs

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

#17032745
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10429) - you deserved it (75489) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML

#17023204
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35987) - you deserved it (4344)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:23am - misc - by Yoda (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

#16847763
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17447) - you deserved it (61242)

On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I attempted to bleach my body hair so I wouldn't have to shave. A little while later, I realized that I'd also succeeded in bleaching my skin, which was incredibly noticeable. I'm hosting a pool party this weekend. FML

#16817769
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9632) - you deserved it (43850)

On 06/23/2011 at 2:56pm - health - by run4fun (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I had to explain to my teenage daughter that no, the dishwasher didn't make the glasses shrink, I'd bought smaller glasses. FML

#16812577
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30252) - you deserved it (5664)

On 06/23/2011 at 4:53am - kids - by wow - Sent from mobile version

Today, I walked downstairs, made a bowl of hot cereal, and held a full conversation with my brother's girlfriend, before I finally put two and two together and realized I hadn't put any pants on. FML

#16541203
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11360) - you deserved it (25527)

On 06/07/2011 at 1:55am - misc - by mongoosemike -

Today, my ex-girlfriend told my entire family and all my friends that we broke up because I came out to her. They all believe her. Twenty two texts and counting. FML

#16525568
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31410) - you deserved it (3288)

On 06/06/2011 at 3:55am - misc - by rapturezz - United States

Today, I was shopping for clothes. I thought this guy was a mannequin because he was standing perfectly still. I poked him and he screamed like a girl. FML

#16464729
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13481) - you deserved it (31829)

On 06/02/2011 at 6:05am - misc - by ohcrap - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

#16464662
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55463) - you deserved it (4261)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I walked through a spider's web with hundreds of baby spiders on it. My afro is now infested. FML

#16129508
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45714) - you deserved it (15655)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:34pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I went on a long overdue vacation to France with my husband and young daughter. As revenge for an earlier prank, my sister has apparently taught my daughter to swear profusely in French. FML

#16068567
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26459) - you deserved it (8559)

On 05/06/2011 at 3:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead)

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

#15598918
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33398) - you deserved it (45070)

On 04/02/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by Toothy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that the demonic voice that made me nearly piss myself all night, was my sister's Furby she stuck in the closet. FML

#15219004
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36567) - you deserved it (6531)

On 03/06/2011 at 2:38pm - misc - by Spooked (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my brother and father thought it would be a good idea to wake me up by turning on a chainsaw and wearing hockey masks. FML

#14753442
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33023) - you deserved it (4157)

On 01/29/2011 at 2:29am - misc - by unlucky dudebag - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my new roommate staring at me, just a few inches from my face. She then told me how easy I would be to kill in my sleep. Then she stood up, naked from head to toe. FML

#14719810
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40675) - you deserved it (3305)

On 01/26/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by 123roomielover (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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