Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2776
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

zsorini2014's page activity

Visits<b>a_cool_guy</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 6:14am<b>Serajwl</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 3:48pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:59pm<b>nicksatank</b> - the 02/13/2010 at 3:15pm<b>Becca03</b> - the 02/03/2010 at 4:15pm<b>wtfismyfml</b> - the 10/11/2009 at 3:09pm<b>Thespade</b> - the 09/13/2009 at 2:56am<b>Hoax</b> - the 07/10/2009 at 8:17pm<b>Envy3</b> - the 07/09/2009 at 1:36am<b>luxornv</b> - the 07/04/2009 at 4:23am<b>xxaaaxx</b> - the 06/27/2009 at 7:31pm<b>ejvlols</b> - the 06/20/2009 at 9:53am<b>StudBoiAyeEm</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 2:22pm<b>compuryan</b> - the 06/07/2009 at 10:53pm<b>Psyche</b> - the 05/24/2009 at 4:20pm<b>sockergurl916</b> - the 05/24/2009 at 3:09am<b>nuclear</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 11:56pm<b>shaawty</b> - the 05/22/2009 at 1:05am

zsorini2014's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

zsorini2014's favorite FMLs

Today, My 5 year old sister informed me she had left me a present in my bed. She had tied a ribbon around a dead rat's neck and propped it up on my pillow. The label says his name was Bert. FML

by toothfairy / 06/26/2009 at 10:20am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML

by ILuvYouSoldiers / 06/26/2009 at 3:57am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working Customer Service at Wal Mart. An elderly lady came to my register to return a pair of white pants. I asked her what was wrong with them and she replied "even when I had underwear on you could still see my pubic hair." The pants had hair on them. FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2009 at 1:41am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a call from my son's second grade teacher. He happens to write and throw with both hands, and wanted to share this during show and tell. Apparently, he didn't know the word for this is ambidextrous, because his teacher told me, "Your son just told the whole class that he's bisexual!" FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2009 at 2:12pm / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

by badmom / 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, I was struggling through an exam and the hot girl next to me seemed to be flying through the questions. So I cheated off her. When we finished I asked her to lunch. She said "No, I just rushed through the exam so I can go fuck my boyfriend." I got shutdown and probably failed an exam. FML

by ananomoose / 04/15/2009 at 7:30pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went over to surprise my girlfriend of two years with flowers and dinner at her apartment. After I knocked, a handsome young man answered the door. Thinking I had the wrong apartment, I apologized, only to hear my girlfriend's voice call from the background, "Baby, who's there?" FML

by willywonks / 03/21/2009 at 1:33am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I finally got up the nerve to ask this really cute girl out I've had a crush on for over eight months. Turns out she isn't a girl. FML

by goodbye / 03/08/2009 at 8:45pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy