About zotler : I'm Zoe.
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zotler's favorite FMLs
Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML
by Holy Testacles / 10/17/2012 at 12:45am / United States / Miscellaneous
by me / 02/19/2012 at 6:37am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML
by rowie1311 / 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Miscellaneous
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- Today, my sister told me to mind my own business when I freaked out about the used tampon she keeps… Today, during an extremely romantic moment of cuddling with my girlfriend she started to cry, turns… Today, at my oldest sisters wedding she forgot something borrowed. she looked at me and said if I'm…