zobo1014

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Offline (the 06/25/2016 at 11:18pm)

zobo1014

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 6084
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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zobo1014's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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zobo1014's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife and I went to our friend's house to play some pool. While playing, a Cicada started to fly towards my face, so I flipped my pool stick over and swatted at it with the fat end of the stick. I hit the bug. However, with the skinny side I hit myself in the snow-globes. FML

by Chris / 04/04/2012 at 10:50pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was woken up by a call from "the Nuisance Call Prevention Registry". The lady on the telephone didn't see the irony. FML

by Telemarket / 04/04/2012 at 6:58am / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Miscellaneous

Today, my four-year-old son decided to bite my butt during prayer at church. The entire sanctuary heard me instinctively swear at him. FML

by potatoebee / 04/03/2012 at 2:19pm / United States (South Carolina) / Kids

Today, I received a call from the company I applied to, only to have my father pick it up and make fun of the man's accent. They won't call me back or take any of my calls, and my dad is completely unapologetic. FML

by Bashit / 03/31/2012 at 9:00pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me by maniacally zooming in and out of traffic while we were on his motorcycle. His mood turned to anger when I nervously admitted to having voided my bowels. FML

by Shantwozzlah / 03/26/2012 at 12:15pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my marriage counselor is currently going through her second divorce. FML

by badadvise / 03/23/2012 at 12:05am / Mexico (Jalisco) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was out with my dog, who loves to bury things. He had recently torn apart his toy and buried it in the sand. I saw a piece of it sticking out of the ground, so I picked it up. It turns out that I was not holding his toy, but rather a dead bat. FML

by GabisayzRAWR / 03/21/2012 at 12:03pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was out with my dog, who loves to bury things. He had recently torn apart his toy and buried it in the sand. I saw a piece of it sticking out of the ground, so I picked it up. It turns out that I was not holding his toy, but rather a dead bat. FML

by GabisayzRAWR / 03/21/2012 at 12:03pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to tell a parent about her son kicking a boy in his class. She blamed me for not watching him. I wasn't watching him because I was turned around to care for another boy he had hit right before that. FML

by LadyJ / 03/20/2012 at 8:23pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, I was so bored that I spent two hours researching the history of spoons. FML

by Anonymous / 03/17/2012 at 11:53am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I managed to staple my finger while showing my kindergartner class how to properly use one. FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2012 at 2:02am / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I was masturbating, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a figure. It was my neighbor staring at me through the window with a total look of disgust. I moved in this weekend and hadn't yet introduced myself to her. FML

by Anonymous / 03/14/2012 at 3:31pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, while at work, a man came up to me and screamed that I was the devil's child, pointing at the tattoo on my wrist the whole time. I just stood there while he prayed for my soul. FML

by lovefortoday / 03/13/2012 at 12:50pm / United States (Indiana) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up after my shower. FML

by anonymous / 03/12/2012 at 4:03am / United States / Health

Today, I discovered that the amount of alcohol I have to drink to build up enough courage to talk to women at a bar is the exact amount of alcohol that prevents me from getting a boner. FML

by socially awkward / 03/10/2012 at 1:00am / United States (New York) / Intimacy