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50 favourites
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Today, I saw Thor and I wanted to see how realistic it was to be swinging a hammer around. Wrong idea. I ended up unconscious on the ground for ten whole minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3674) - you deserved it (25168)
On 06/08/2012 at 4:09am - misc - by runner2731 - United States (Ohio)
Today, instead of having my friends come pick me up, my dad drove me over to visit them. He insisted on walking me up to the door, hugging me goodbye, and making sure my friends were appropriate enough to hang out with. I'm in college. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17630) - you deserved it (2158)
On 06/06/2012 at 1:26am - misc - by that girl. - United States
Today, my mum thought it was perfectly acceptable to post a status on Facebook about how well she is healing up after her hemorrhoid surgery, and tag me in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16764) - you deserved it (1667)
On 06/04/2012 at 11:02am - misc - by unacceptable (woman) - Australia
Today, I found a video of a school play I starred in years ago. I was ecstatic, because it's really the only memento of my childhood I have left. Unfortunately, it started with my grandpa groaning, "Ahh shit," and degenerated into him muttering over the audio about "those fucking commies." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12966) - you deserved it (1043)
On 05/29/2012 at 1:58pm - misc - by joanne (woman) - United States
Today, there was a knock on my apartment door. It was the man from next-door, who sarcastically asked if I was alright, because he said he heard me screaming in agony. I was singing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12972) - you deserved it (2808)
On 05/26/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by MALICEG - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I realised that I've been deployed for far too long, when I caught myself looking down the cleavage of a mannequin wearing a bathing suit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16415) - you deserved it (1798)
On 05/25/2012 at 12:03pm - misc - by Lonely_Army (man) - Qatar
Today, I finally told my roommate, who doesn't pay rent, to go get a job. He left, came back, and immediately went to my refrigerator to eat. I asked him about his job and what his pay is. Apparently, putting together a bike for a kid is a job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11763) - you deserved it (1564)
On 05/24/2012 at 3:41am - money - by hunterjumper1212 - United States (California)
Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48305) - you deserved it (2257)
On 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, the father of my child couldn't understand why he had been laid off from his job as a painter's assistant. He couldn't find a broom or vacuum, so he "cleaned" a carpet by laying down strips of painter's tape and pulling it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14207) - you deserved it (2336)
On 05/07/2012 at 11:57am - work - by notrocketscience (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, my husband and I went on vacation. We got lost and had to ask the locals for directions to our hotel. Neither of us could understand their accents, and we ended up wandering around blindly for hours until we made it back on our own. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6789) - you deserved it (10794)
On 05/05/2012 at 5:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I got tasered by a cop. It was his second day on the job. My crime? Sneezing during a sobriety test. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21789) - you deserved it (1426)
On 05/05/2012 at 7:44am - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, it was confirmed that the "no pet rule" in my apartment complex is so strict that I'm not even allowed to have sea monkeys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16100) - you deserved it (1607)
On 05/01/2012 at 11:59pm - animals - by Monkeyless (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I yet again heard a friend say "YOLO" as if it's a word. It was so annoying that I had to restrain myself from punching him in the face and offering him the chance to suck on one of my turds, since apparently "YOLO." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13437) - you deserved it (3345)
On 04/24/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I found out that my lovely amazing boyfriend likes to pee in everything other than the toilet. This includes: Hawaiian punch jugs, the sink, empty cans/bottles and out of my window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16654) - you deserved it (2286)
On 04/23/2012 at 12:44am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21731) - you deserved it (3610)
On 04/23/2012 at 12:04am - love - by gottalovefriends - United States (New Hampshire)
Monday 20 May 2013
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