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Mobility
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Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20428) - you deserved it (1706)
On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)
Today, I'm at work on a construction site for a high rise building, on the 12th floor today. I've developed a severe case of the runs, causing me to need to rush to the nearest toilet periodically. Luckily for me it's conveniently located on the ground floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13976) - you deserved it (817)
On 11/08/2012 at 9:36am - health - by bob the builder - United States (Mississippi)
Today, as my girlfriend and I were finishing up a romantic dinner, she gazed into my eyes for a moment and said, "You know, sometimes you look like a character from Sesame Street." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11325) - you deserved it (1086)
On 11/07/2012 at 6:48pm - misc - by derve - United States
Today, I was planning on enjoying my one day off work from the hospital, at home. I got a call saying I had to come in because my department was short-handed. I went in to find almost everyone there. Turns out it was a prank by my coworkers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17348) - you deserved it (1109)
Today, my grandmother said to me, "You look just like your mother did at your age. Except you're fatter of course." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14330) - you deserved it (3018)
On 11/05/2012 at 12:39am - misc - by poro123 - United Kingdom
Today, my husband and I found out that our dog was pregnant. He now refuses to have kids with me for at least two years, because he wants to raise the puppies without any "distractions". FML
I agree, your life sucks (19507) - you deserved it (2630)
On 10/30/2012 at 2:45pm - animals - by Lilly - United States
Today, while in a pharmacy, I walked over to the shaving cream aisle. I picked up a can to smell it and unknowingly pushed the button, spraying an old guy in front of me. He freaked out and started telling everyone that the ceiling above him was leaking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5962) - you deserved it (8008)
On 10/29/2012 at 6:39pm - misc - by IndianAngel96 - United States (Texas)
Today, I was writing out palm cards and didn't know if I'd spelled a word correctly, so I stared at it for about 10 seconds waiting for spell check to tell me if it was right or not before I realised I was writing on paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4396) - you deserved it (19579)
On 10/27/2012 at 8:43am - misc - by katier8295 (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my grandma took it upon herself to give me the sex talk. After explaining the mechanics in excessive detail, she said I shouldn't be afraid to sleep around. Apparently, I need to be comfortable with the man who'll be "conning me into blowing him for the next 50 years." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19126) - you deserved it (1930)
On 10/26/2012 at 1:58pm - intimacy - by fiftyshardsofbroccoli (woman) - United States
Today, my dad was teaching me how to drive. He told me that stop signs with white outlines are "optional." I ran through the next one I saw and got pulled over by a cop. My dad is making me pay the ticket for being "that stupid." Thanks dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8039) - you deserved it (24401)
On 10/23/2012 at 9:19am - money - by Dinger1992 - United States
Today, I had a job interview for a job I've been dying to have. As I'm walking into the office, the manager says, "Aren't you my son's ex, the one he cheated on?" All I could do was sit there quietly as he laughed at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20786) - you deserved it (1411)
On 10/23/2012 at 3:54am - work - by emilyparra1 - United States (Florida)
Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6761) - you deserved it (36808)
On 10/23/2012 at 12:25am - kids - by Bratty son (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got threatened to get dragged out of the window at work because I wouldn't sell someone hot wings. I work at Taco Bell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15760) - you deserved it (1030)
On 10/19/2012 at 2:43am - work - by Taco Hell - United States (Ohio)
Today, at a family reunion, we all squeezed in for a picture. I set the self-timer and ran to get in it. 2 seconds before the picture went off, some guy came up, stole the camera, and ran away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18264) - you deserved it (1350)
On 10/15/2012 at 3:57pm - money - by Pissed (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was babysitting, and we were playing a game. Because he was little, I let him win all the games. He then turned to me and said, "You're really bad at this." I got very defensive and won the next game, and was actually proud that I beat a 3-year-old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11450) - you deserved it (5519)
On 10/14/2012 at 8:45pm - kids - by amiliaroberts123 (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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