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Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in front of an entire street of people. We've only been dating for a week. One of the women in the crowd then called me heartless and threw a hamburger at me when I turned him down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42153) - you deserved it (7298)
On 04/25/2011 at 9:49am - love - by Jade (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)
Today, my girlfriend hid my car keys and decided that she wouldn't give them back until I succeeded in giving her an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13581) - you deserved it (58456)
On 04/08/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by failure -
Today, I called the car repair shop to complain to the manager about their tow driver who keeps making sexual passes at me. The girl taking my call started crying and said that their driver was her husband. I'm being sexually harassed, my car is dead, and I think I just ended a marriage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39226) - you deserved it (3006)
On 03/20/2011 at 1:42pm - misc - by WhyMe (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was telling my dad about how I emasculated my guy friends because I can drive a stick shift while they can't. He said, "And you wonder why people think you're a lesbian." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25108) - you deserved it (9083)
On 03/15/2011 at 1:58am - misc - by Megara (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, I learned that if I don't clean out the litter box everyday, my cat will resort to shitting in the laundry basket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8875) - you deserved it (22514)
On 03/03/2011 at 7:45pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, I told my boyfriend I was leaving him because he's cheating on me. He then told me he will die without me. When I said that I didn't care, he said 'OK. I'll kill myself!' and then held his breath in attempt to suffocate himself. I can't believe I dated this idiot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41930) - you deserved it (12391)
On 03/01/2011 at 8:24am - intimacy - by WhyMe? -
Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42545) - you deserved it (33104)
On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was walking in the park with my boyfriend of 3 years. He stopped and knelt down in front of me. I started to panic, then he told me to calm down, my shoe was untied. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24177) - you deserved it (9533)
On 02/09/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by maddie! - United States (New York)
Today, my brother and father thought it would be a good idea to wake me up by turning on a chainsaw and wearing hockey masks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28216) - you deserved it (3766)
On 01/29/2011 at 2:29am - misc - by unlucky dudebag - United States (California)
Today, I found out that the girl who my high school boyfriend cheated on me with is now the woman my husband is having an affair with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52570) - you deserved it (2761)
On 01/08/2011 at 12:22am - misc - by sad (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, after an argument with a coworker, I sent him "Sorry about being such a jerk" in a reply to a mass email he had sent. I accidentally hit 'Reply All'. I now have 32 "It's okay" messages in my inbox. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6816) - you deserved it (22719)
On 12/20/2010 at 5:26pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I woke up with a hangover, a shaved head, and my period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26961) - you deserved it (15982)
On 11/25/2010 at 12:54pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, after wondering why I've never met my father, I asked my mom if I was the product of a one night stand. She replied with, "Well, technically he didn't spend the night." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21898) - you deserved it (2405)
On 11/21/2010 at 6:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)
Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't feel like he loved me. His response? "Why else would I be with you? Your looks?" He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21854) - you deserved it (6191)
On 10/20/2010 at 2:41pm - love - by rockefoe (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28886) - you deserved it (16269)
On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)
Friday 24 May 2013
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