Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (12 hours ago) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4595
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About zobara : There's nothing to say about me.

zobara's page activity

Visits<b>MandieL</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 11:56pm<b>NoYesNoYesNoYes</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 7:46pm<b>alexxxx92</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 6:34am<b>thisguy22</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 12:15pm<b>OwlsMakeBowels</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 3:37pm<b>xxmollyxx</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 7:36am<b>JenDuffy</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 8:22pm<b>EMOHATE</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 10:26pm<b>Boooooooooop</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 10:04pm<b>obey_clarence</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 1:57am<b>Wormie14</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 9:24am<b>anonykinetic</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 1:47pm<b>klm2purple</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 9:30pm<b>123765</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 8:27pm<b>TaylorWhiteGirl</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 9:23am<b>andrex000</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 4:04pm<b>FinJage</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 5:31pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 3:19pm

Fucked!<b>MandieL</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 8:08pm

zobara's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of zobara's badges

zobara's favorite FMLs

Today, I was with my girlfriend at lunch when a group of guys came over. They started calling her a whore and a bunch of other shit, so I cussed them out. Turns out she was not only cheating on me, but all the other guys too. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27124) - you deserved it (2029)

On 09/21/2015 at 8:24pm - love - by Jgfenix - United States (Colorado)

Today, I woke up to a cat licking my face. I don't have a cat. I quickly put the cat out the front door and went back to sleep. When I woke up later, I remembered that I had agreed to take care of my sister's cat for a week. I looked out the door, but the cat is nowhere to be found. FML


I agree, your life sucks (15816) - you deserved it (30186)

On 09/18/2015 at 8:22am - animals - by introublenow (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dog vomited a writhing mass of maggots. It was the most disgusting thing I've ever smelled, and I was baffled as to where she found a maggot infested dead thing to eat. Baffled, until my mom reminded me that my cat has been missing, presumed dead, for over a week. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25634) - you deserved it (1591)

On 09/17/2015 at 5:08pm - animals - by wormsmeat (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I had a complete and total Incredible Hulk meltdown when I realized that he had opened a bottle of very expensive whiskey, originally bottled by my great great grandfather in Scotland, and used it as a mixer with fucking Pepsi. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34643) - you deserved it (2401)

On 09/17/2015 at 3:48pm - kids - by Angus (man) - France

Today, I gave blood for the first time, since I'm a universal donor. After it was done, I passed out, woke up, puked, and passed out again. The kind nurses told me I was the worst case they had seen all week. So much for doing something to help others. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22131) - you deserved it (1900)

On 09/11/2015 at 9:55am - health - by angelsaredicks (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I got hit by a USPS truck. Luckily, I have car insurance. Just kidding. My insurance got cancelled two days ago for lack of responding to letters they sent. Letters that the USPS didn't deliver. FML

Today, the guy I've been seeing bought me a nice bottle of wine and cooked dinner for me. Later, we started having sex for the first time. All was going well until he ran to the bathroom mid-sex and I had to listen to him with explosive diarrhea. The worst part is, he wanted to keep going after. FML

Today, I parked my car, went to pay for my spot, and returned to my car only to find a parking violation ticket tucked under the windshield wipers. This all happened in less than a minute. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25687) - you deserved it (1835)

On 09/05/2015 at 12:26am - money - by occam's pube-razor (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I planned on telling the girl I like that I have feelings for her. What I didn't plan on was having a panic attack and whispering "I really like you!" super creepily and immediately saying "bye" and running away in shame. FML

Today, I was lying on a couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20072) - you deserved it (8581)

On 08/24/2015 at 4:46am - misc - by Annie (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24983) - you deserved it (6572)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:25am - kids - by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay (man) - Malta

Today, I was on a date, and I tried breaking the ice by telling him my best joke. He laughed hysterically for a good 10 seconds, started beating the table with his fist, then suddenly went deadpan and said "No, seriously, you're a moron. Screw this date." FML


I agree, your life sucks (27953) - you deserved it (3000)

On 07/24/2015 at 2:54pm - misc - by HAIL SITHIS (woman) - United States

Today, a girl with a picture of One Direction as her desktop asked if I wanted to partner with her on a 70% law assignment. Two hours after saying no, I found out that she's a legal genius with a guaranteed job in the field and a near perfect GPA. FML


I agree, your life sucks (11375) - you deserved it (48770)

On 07/22/2015 at 2:18am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, I woke up and texted my girlfriend, "Good morning" like I do everyday. She responded with, "I'm dating somebody else". FML

Today, while walking home with my girlfriend we decided to take a shortcut in the woods. After hearing a huge noise, she pushed me and ran. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24208) - you deserved it (2713)

On 07/12/2015 at 3:56pm - love - by sheWontbeOnMyZombieApocteam - United States (Texas)

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Céline's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: