About zobara : There's nothing to say about me.
zobara's FML badges
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
zobara's favorite FMLs
Today, while shopping, I told my wife I'd love some pork chops for dinner. Someone nearby muttered, "That's practically cannibalism, ya fat pig." My wife immediately had a "coughing attack" that sounded suspiciously like it was covering up laughter. FML
by dempasi / 05/06/2016 at 2:51pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, my overweight colleague twisted his ankle. He's pretty self-conscious about his weight, but I had a brain-fart and told him he shouldn't try to put too much weight on it. His feelings are more hurt than his ankle now. FML
by WeighYourWords / 05/03/2016 at 7:12am / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Work
by onemoredonut / 05/02/2016 at 9:39pm / United States (Virginia) / Work
Today, my fiancé tells me he loves me about 100 times a day. At first it was cute, but now it's getting really annoying. We can't have a conversation without him throwing in about 10 "I love you"s. I'm beginning to not want to talk to him anymore. FML
by Jane / 04/27/2016 at 11:58pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
Today, I got mugged. Trying to be brave, I attacked my mugger, who then broke my nose. Suddenly, I was saved by someone: A 15 year-old goth girl who promptly tackled the mugger to the ground. I'm a 21 year old man. FML
by Anonymous / 04/27/2016 at 1:32pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I ran into a new guy at work who told me the regional manager was visiting today to evaluate the staff. I scoffed and said that everything I'd heard about the manager made him seem like a total prick. His reply? "Maybe, but I'm a prick who can FIRE people." FML
by Anonymous / 04/20/2016 at 6:04am / Australia (Victoria) / Work
by anonymous / 04/19/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband's ex-girlfriend is getting a restraining order on him. Turns out, for the past 2 years of our marriage, he has been trying to contact her and ditching work to stalk her. To top it all off, he told me not to come to court with him because he doesn't want her to see he downgraded. FML
by Anonymous / 04/19/2016 at 8:56pm / United States (California) / Love
by zefronke8 / 04/17/2016 at 2:01pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, when I tried to break up with my girlfriend of 2 years, she had no idea we were even dating. She thought of all the movies, dinners and "sleep overs" I had with her was because we were such great friends. FML
by K.S.S. / 04/16/2016 at 10:24pm / United States (Indiana) / Love
Today, my 3 year-old woke up with diarrhea. The stench caused him to throw up. My husband started sympathy puking all over the floor. I'm so exhausted already that I'm considering just burning the damn house down to avoid cleaning it all up. FML
by Anonymous / 04/16/2016 at 3:16am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by SureDoesMakeAGirlFeelGood / 04/12/2016 at 9:45pm / Canada (Newfoundland) / Intimacy
Today, I lay in bed reflecting on my fiancé's complaint about my lack of displays of affection. I felt terrible, so I rolled over and hugged him in his sleep. He's a fully trained martial artist and his immediate reaction was to try to snap my neck. FML
by bruised / 04/11/2016 at 3:26am / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, while driving, a spider crawled onto my gearstick. Not being afraid of them, I casually flicked it off. Onto the person sitting next to me. The person evaluating me for my driving test at the time, who happened to be arachnophobic. FML
by Arachnofail / 04/08/2016 at 12:16am / Miscellaneous
by Upfront / 04/06/2016 at 1:19am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous