Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

zobara

Offline (the 10/22/2014 at 12:47pm) | Search for a member

zobara

0Liked!

zobara
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1703
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About zobara : There's nothing to say about me.

zobara's page activity

Visits<b>klm2purple</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 9:30pm<b>123765</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 8:27pm<b>TaylorWhiteGirl</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 9:23am<b>andrex000</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 4:04pm<b>FinJage</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 5:31pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 3:19pm<b>NOTHEL15</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 5:26pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:48pm<b>WiderWille</b> - the 08/15/2011 at 12:56pm

zobara's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of zobara's badges

zobara's favorite FMLs

Today, I came out as bisexual to my friends via group message. They didn't respond; I had a panic attack. An hour later, one of my friends texted back, "k". FML

Today, I volunteered to tutor a 17-year-old girl in science. I had to explain in detail of what the real Big Bang theory was, as she only knew about the show. Later, I heard I was reported by her because apparently, "I was trying to convert her to Scientology." I now know why she needed a tutor. FML

Today, I was skating in the city when I slipped and fractured my arm. As I was lying in pain, a guy walked up to me, frisked my pocket and took my wallet. He then said: "It's nothing personal." FML

#21281599
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33936) - you deserved it (2830)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:50am - misc - by ColdStones (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my annoying colleague gasped, wrapped her arms around herself, started sweating and curled up in a ball crying, "No, no, no" in front of several customers. They accused me of 'setting her off', when I blurted out, "Sorry, she gets panic attacks". All I did was say the word 'abortion'. FML

#21281594
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28322) - you deserved it (5150)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:31am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

#21281163
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27106) - you deserved it (6973)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I confronted my girlfriend after catching her cheating on me. After she finished crying, she had the brass balls to say she'd understand if I needed a couple of weeks to forgive her, and asked me for bus fare so she could go tell the other guy they could only be friends now. FML

#21280490
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35043) - you deserved it (2955)

On 10/18/2014 at 2:44pm - love - by yee-whore (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I climbed onto my boyfriend's lap and sexily told him "It's getting hot in here," and started unbuttoning my shirt. He said "Oh," pushed me off him, and went to turn the ceiling fan on. FML

#21279866
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36022) - you deserved it (5122)

On 10/17/2014 at 2:29pm - intimacy - by gettinghotinhere - United States (California)

Today, my dad told me someday I'll find a man who wants a nice lumberjack for a wife. FML

#21279635
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30155) - you deserved it (2961)

On 10/17/2014 at 4:14am - love - by axewoman -

Today, while on vacation, my parents called to inform me that my best friend had died in a car accident. Why? To trick me into tearfully confessing my love for him. It worked. FML

#21272324
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47055) - you deserved it (3858)

On 10/06/2014 at 9:14pm - love - by whywouldyoudothat - United States (Arizona)

Today, was the day I would turn my life around and start losing weight. I went outside for my first run and said, "I got this!" I confidently stepped forward, the first symbolic steps to my new life. In the anticipation, I forgot my porch had steps. I face-planted on my driveway. FML

#21271662
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36105) - you deserved it (7241)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:17pm - health - by PickYourselfUp (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my neighbor called the cops on me, claiming I'd threatened him with a gun. Despite zero proof, they took me to the station and gave me hell. I guess what I've learned today is that you should never offend your crazy neighbor by breaking up with his daughter. FML

#21270631
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37683) - you deserved it (3874)

On 10/04/2014 at 12:31pm - misc - by runsinthefamily (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I thought I would be cute for my 1 year anniversary with my girlfriend so I cooked a three course meal for her with candles and rose petals on the floor. She loved the dinner, except now she's passed out in a food coma upstairs while I'm left with the dishes. FML

#21270586
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34960) - you deserved it (6260)

On 10/04/2014 at 9:57am - love - by cuteloser (man) - Australia

Today, I got a round of applause. Too bad it was from my thighs as I went down the stairs. FML

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45417) - you deserved it (3477)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend, only for her to slap me, throwing the "fake ring" away and storming off, convinced it was a cruel joke. FML

#21265921
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37184) - you deserved it (3080)

On 09/26/2014 at 5:27pm - love - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: