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Today, I was on the phone with a client, when the gum I was casually chewing fell out of my mouth and down my shirt. While I was trying to dig it out, two of our newest customers walked into the lobby to see what looked like me fondling my breasts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15680) - you deserved it (8646)
On 02/10/2011 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my professor's son died in a car accident and class has been cancelled until further notice. All my friends were delighted and cheered about it in front of me. I was dating my professor's son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (92795) - you deserved it (3528)
On 02/10/2011 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8577) - you deserved it (26245)
On 02/10/2011 at 11:09am - misc - by Jaws (man) - France (Alsace)
Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5853) - you deserved it (35116)
On 02/09/2011 at 8:12pm - misc - by inosehowthatgotthere (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by creating an account on Runescape; his favorite game. After finding him in-game, I started talking to him, not revealing who I was. After a while, I asked him if he had a girlfriend. He promptly said no and asked me for nude pics. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44918) - you deserved it (12138)
On 02/09/2011 at 2:22pm - love - by Samyett (woman) - United States
Today, I was walking in the park with my boyfriend of 3 years. He stopped and knelt down in front of me. I started to panic, then he told me to calm down, my shoe was untied. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24175) - you deserved it (9533)
On 02/09/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by maddie! - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that even though my sister and I are identical twins, I'm known as "The ugly one". FML
I agree, your life sucks (29767) - you deserved it (2467)
On 02/07/2011 at 8:21pm - misc - by 5minsolder (woman) - United States
Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58694) - you deserved it (4910)
On 02/04/2011 at 9:08am - intimacy - by theish -
Today, my boyfriend finally got me to orgasm, for the first time in my life, after trying for months. He started laughing when I climaxed. I asked why. Apparently I look like an Down's Syndrome child when I climax. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30126) - you deserved it (4769)
On 02/03/2011 at 7:28pm - intimacy - by Embarrassed -
Today, while in my doctor's packed waiting room, an elderly woman insisted I take her seat. I thanked her, but politely declined. She began to yell, saying I was "ungrateful", until I sat down. She then left, laughing, as I discovered that she peed in the chair. Apparently, she does this often. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32973) - you deserved it (3190)
On 02/03/2011 at 5:40am - health - by Summer_Jane (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my husband decided it would be funny to shout "Woohoo!" in Michael Jackson's voice while having an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22764) - you deserved it (4590)
On 02/03/2011 at 12:17am - intimacy - by anonymous -
Today, I went to shovel the massive amount of snow that was on our car. After spending time in the cold wind, I finally finished, realizing it wasn't my car. It was an identical car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17298) - you deserved it (4266)
On 02/02/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by hehe -
Today, after three weeks of putting it off, I decided to ask out the girl I've had a major crush on since third grade. When I told her, she smiled, but then quickly said, "But aren't you gay?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29334) - you deserved it (3419)
On 02/02/2011 at 12:11pm - love - by straightasaneedle (man) - Germany (Hessen)
Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML
I agree, your life sucks (30140) - you deserved it (3852)
On 02/01/2011 at 8:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was going through the history on my computer. Apparently, while I was at school my mother used my computer, and I now know my mother wants to learn how to make her breasts look larger, amongst other things. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20142) - you deserved it (2685)
On 02/01/2011 at 8:05am - intimacy - by LonelyBoy (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 20 May 2013
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