Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

zniltiaC

Offline (the 04/18/2015 at 2:55pm) | Search for a member

zniltiaC

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5060
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About zniltiaC : I don't know how to 'about you'.

zniltiaC's page activity

Visits<b>WafflePunch</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 3:11am<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 6:08am<b>ChilledCheese</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 9:48pm<b>michaelf461</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 11:29am<b>Burton_Forever</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 10:47pm<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 9:43pm<b>benjamins39</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 5:25pm<b>totallybananas</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 1:23am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 9:04am<b>Landesanity</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 12:48am<b>wilsontws</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 6:25pm<b>savygirl367</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 8:09pm<b>robear86</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 4:59am<b>Gentelman999</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 7:30pm<b>Grand_Cookie</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 3:40pm<b>judkins_1808</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 6:43pm<b>gooddealjoe</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 11:51pm<b>comadivine</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 5:11pm

zniltiaC's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of zniltiaC's badges

zniltiaC's favorite FMLs

Today, while tanning on a family cruise, I woke up to a crowd of people staring at me in disgust. Apparently, I'd fallen asleep, developed a boner, and started french-kissing the air. I had to sit through both the surveillance tapes and a grand bollocking from security in the aftermath. FML

#16161351
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39946) - you deserved it (10097)

On 05/13/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by f*cks_sake - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had to run a mile in gym class for fitness training. If it takes longer than 10 minutes to run the stretch, you have to re-take it. My time was 10:02. FML

#16160002
533 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35794) - you deserved it (18913)

On 05/13/2011 at 5:10pm - misc - by Alex (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my husband and I went to the state fair. The entire time, he complained about all the money we were losing because of the high prices of both rides and food. Towards the end of the night, we counted the cash we had left and found we were $50 short. Apparently, it fell out of his pocket. FML

#16158573
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28641) - you deserved it (4193)

On 05/13/2011 at 2:47pm - money - by Catie - United States (Florida)

Today, I was wondering why I was getting strange looks all day at work. When I got to a mirror after my shift, I noticed a booger hanging out of my nose, which was visible only when I smiled. My job involves greeting people all day with a huge smile. FML

#16155788
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29347) - you deserved it (5374)

On 05/13/2011 at 8:27am - work - by Smile No More -

Today, on the school bus, I rapped on a window in an attempt to get my friend's attention. A guy sitting behind me took this as an opportunity to shove my face into the window, breaking my nose. FML

#16146603
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30600) - you deserved it (4802)

On 05/12/2011 at 5:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got a paper cut from a 'get well soon' card. FML

#16140473
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37792) - you deserved it (5336)

On 05/12/2011 at 3:54am - health - by Anonymous -

Today, my doctor told me I should consider a breast reduction. I'm a man. FML

#16136460
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35747) - you deserved it (12749)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:20pm - health - by anonymous -

Today, I walked through a spider's web with hundreds of baby spiders on it. My afro is now infested. FML

#16129508
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47820) - you deserved it (16360)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:34pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I found out I was born as a result of someone switching my mom's birth control pills with tic tac. FML

#16129484
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44543) - you deserved it (3771)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I was auditioning for a talent show. I asked my girlfriend if I could sing to her before I went. She said sure. Thirty seconds in, she got up and mumbled, "You're only going to embarrass yourself." FML

#16128552
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23279) - you deserved it (14199)

On 05/11/2011 at 11:19am - misc - by NotChadKrouger -

Today, I realized I have more dogs than I do friends. I have two dogs. FML

#16126414
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35584) - you deserved it (6169)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:48am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I puked up a centipede. FML

#16126004
252 comments

Today, my 12 year old son came home from school and informed me that he bought an air guitar for $20. He honestly thinks this is a good price. FML

#16113855
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35263) - you deserved it (11563)

On 05/10/2011 at 1:18am - kids - by Whatdididowrong? -

Today, my identical twin sister got in trouble for sneaking out of the house to see her boyfriend. My father decided to ground both of us, because it would be "too confusing" for him otherwise. FML

#16057937
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59258) - you deserved it (4676)

On 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Monika (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while my teacher was helping me with a problem, the gum he was chewing fell from his mouth and down my shirt. FML

#15964588
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41577) - you deserved it (4313)

On 04/28/2011 at 3:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: