About zniltiaC : I don't know how to 'about you'.
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zniltiaC's favorite FMLs
Today, my paranoid wreck of a girlfriend read a text message on my phone from a woman asking if I was coming over for dinner. The woman was my mom. My girlfriend stormed out and hasn't answered my calls all day. FML
by mommydearest / 09/04/2011 at 12:08pm / Denmark (Nordjylland) / Love
by southernluxe / 09/04/2011 at 5:36am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was eating a brownie my grandmother had made, only to discover an inch long piece of what resembled dead skin in the middle of it. This discovery was only made after taking a bite and wondering why the consistency was wrong. FML
by brownieswillneverbethesame / 09/04/2011 at 2:18am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that my neighbors took it upon themselves to knock down the fence we shared, and putting up a new one. Thus fencing my pool into their yard. When I asked them why, he replied, "We thought you weren't coming back." I was gone for 4 months tending to my sister with breast cancer. FML
by Pool-less / 09/04/2011 at 2:09am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/04/2011 at 1:41am / United States / Love
Today, my best friend and I were playing Call of Duty, when he said he had to go to the bathroom. Curious, I checked his phone. A text message read, "Tell your friend you're going to the bathroom and come eat. Pizza is here." from his dad. Apparently, I'm not good enough to feed. FML
by Pizza-less / 09/04/2011 at 12:16am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/04/2011 at 12:15am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by May / 09/04/2011 at 12:08am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by haha / 09/03/2011 at 8:04pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by appaluver / 09/03/2011 at 7:53pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by SterlingSilver91 / 09/03/2011 at 7:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, I was at my grandparents' house, when the power went out. Even though we were supplied with candles and flashlights, we still had to stumble around in the darkness. They'd left both the candles and flashlights in the pitch black, unnavigable basement. FML
by itsgonnabealongnight... / 09/03/2011 at 4:52pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by abby181 / 09/03/2011 at 10:36am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
Today, I was at the bar with a date. My date made a joke about me being a slow drinker, so I tried to impress her by chugging the rest of my glass. She was impressed with how fast I chugged my beer, until it came back up. FML
by ol faithful / 09/03/2011 at 5:24am / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to a restaurant with a girl I really liked. She started crying when an overweight family walked in and loudly sobbed about how the parents were "murdering" their children. This made the father of that family try to fight me. FML
by whatdidIdo / 09/03/2011 at 1:33am / United States (New Hampshire) / Health