Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

zniltiaC

Offline (the 08/21/2014 at 12:55am) | Search for a member

zniltiaC

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3292
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About zniltiaC : I don't know how to 'about you'.

zniltiaC's page activity

Visits<b>wilsontws</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 6:25pm<b>Burton_Forever</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 3:29pm<b>savygirl367</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 8:09pm<b>robear86</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 4:59am<b>Gentelman999</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 7:30pm<b>Grand_Cookie</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 3:40pm<b>judkins_1808</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 6:43pm<b>gooddealjoe</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 11:51pm<b>comadivine</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 5:11pm<b>stevenJB</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 9:51am<b>Angelastic</b> - the 08/01/2011 at 2:08pm<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 08/01/2011 at 6:40am<b>Roadkill007</b> - the 07/06/2011 at 5:34pm<b>Karamelo</b> - the 06/26/2011 at 12:17pm<b>Neut</b> - the 06/26/2011 at 11:19am<b>opfreer</b> - the 06/18/2011 at 10:57pm<b>TheB0a</b> - the 06/17/2011 at 11:28am<b>mastermaddox7788</b> - the 06/13/2011 at 11:03am

zniltiaC's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of zniltiaC's badges

zniltiaC's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to Victoria's Secret to buy a bra. A woman sized me and then gave me a bra to try on in the fitting room. To my pleasure, it seemed to fit well. The woman who had sized me came in to check on me and replied, "Yeah, it happens. Not everyone can be symmetrical." FML

#17680068
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24608) - you deserved it (2293)

On 09/06/2011 at 12:22pm - misc - by lopsided - United States

Today, my boyfriend let me know that when we met, he wouldn't have even talked to me if I was as fat as I am now. But lucky for me, he stays with me because, "there's love or something." FML

#17679754
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27570) - you deserved it (11674)

On 09/06/2011 at 11:11am - love - by emopoe - United States

Today, my boyfriend let me know that when we met, he wouldn't have even talked to me if I was as fat as I am now. But lucky for me, he stays with me because, "there's love or something." FML

#17679754
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27570) - you deserved it (11674)

On 09/06/2011 at 11:11am - love - by emopoe - United States

Today, I went to visit my alcoholic father. He remembered to ask me how my dog Reggie is, but could not remember the name of "my pal." My "pal" is also my wife of four years. FML

#17674515
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22469) - you deserved it (1947)

On 09/05/2011 at 9:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by covering my car with post-it notes that read "it's you not me." FML

#17673580
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24961) - you deserved it (3526)

On 09/05/2011 at 7:14pm - love - by rplovez (woman) - Canada

Today, a five year old that I am babysitting picked up a knife and said he would chop my nuts off if I didn't give him his ice cream before dinner. Only 5 more hours to go. FML

#17672212
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28960) - you deserved it (2993)

On 09/05/2011 at 4:23pm - kids - by thatoneguy - United States (Texas)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML

#17664853
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26794) - you deserved it (10993)

On 09/04/2011 at 9:27pm - love - by ddll (man) - Singapore

Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML

#17663371
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29838) - you deserved it (4012)

On 09/04/2011 at 6:10pm - misc - by ironic driver - United States (Texas)

Today, I was digging in the backyard when my mom came out, nodded her head approvingly, and with a straight face told me it was good practice for when I inevitably go to prison. FML

#17661363
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24040) - you deserved it (3993)

On 09/04/2011 at 1:05pm - work - by mike - United States

Today, at my dental practice, we received a shipment of the stupid flavoured gloves my boss ordered to make the place more "friendly to the kids". I started working in an adult patient's mouth, when he decided to start creepily making out with my fingers. FML

#17661211
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32176) - you deserved it (2668)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:42pm - work - by -- - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend bitched me out for being too controlling. Apparently, not only am I being unreasonable by not wanting him visiting strip clubs with his friends, I'm also just "looking for excuses to get mad" at him. FML

#17661200
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26943) - you deserved it (15971)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:40pm - love - by inlovewithstupid (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML

#17661103
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47935) - you deserved it (5738)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my paranoid wreck of a girlfriend read a text message on my phone from a woman asking if I was coming over for dinner. The woman was my mom. My girlfriend stormed out and hasn't answered my calls all day. FML

#17661028
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27712) - you deserved it (3625)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:08pm - love - by mommydearest (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML

#17659578
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35957) - you deserved it (9402)

On 09/04/2011 at 5:36am - intimacy - by southernluxe - United States

Today, I was eating a brownie my grandmother had made, only to discover an inch long piece of what resembled dead skin in the middle of it. This discovery was only made after taking a bite and wondering why the consistency was wrong. FML

#17658783
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26865) - you deserved it (2039)

On 09/04/2011 at 2:18am - misc - by brownieswillneverbethesame (woman) - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: