About zniltiaC : Meh
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I went to visit my alcoholic father. He remembered to ask me how my dog Reggie is, but could not remember the name of "my pal." My "pal" is also my wife of four years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17437) - you deserved it (1370)
On 09/05/2011 at 9:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by covering my car with post-it notes that read "it's you not me." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19710) - you deserved it (2528)
On 09/05/2011 at 7:14pm - love - by rplovez (woman) - Canada
Today, a five year old that I am babysitting picked up a knife and said he would chop my nuts off if I didn't give him his ice cream before dinner. Only 5 more hours to go. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23380) - you deserved it (2121)
On 09/05/2011 at 4:23pm - kids - by thatoneguy - United States (Texas)
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21075) - you deserved it (8334)
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23921) - you deserved it (2869)
On 09/04/2011 at 6:10pm - misc - by ironic driver - United States (Texas)
Today, I was digging in the backyard when my mom came out, nodded her head approvingly, and with a straight face told me it was good practice for when I inevitably go to prison. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19779) - you deserved it (3551)
On 09/04/2011 at 1:05pm - work - by mike - United States
Today, at my dental practice, we received a shipment of the stupid flavoured gloves my boss ordered to make the place more "friendly to the kids". I started working in an adult patient's mouth, when he decided to start creepily making out with my fingers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26804) - you deserved it (2263)
Today, my boyfriend bitched me out for being too controlling. Apparently, not only am I being unreasonable by not wanting him visiting strip clubs with his friends, I'm also just "looking for excuses to get mad" at him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21544) - you deserved it (12328)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:40pm - love - by inlovewithstupid (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41342) - you deserved it (5084)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my paranoid wreck of a girlfriend read a text message on my phone from a woman asking if I was coming over for dinner. The woman was my mom. My girlfriend stormed out and hasn't answered my calls all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22017) - you deserved it (2629)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:08pm - love - by mommydearest (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)
Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28907) - you deserved it (7064)
On 09/04/2011 at 5:36am - intimacy - by southernluxe - United States
Today, I was eating a brownie my grandmother had made, only to discover an inch long piece of what resembled dead skin in the middle of it. This discovery was only made after taking a bite and wondering why the consistency was wrong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22373) - you deserved it (1716)
On 09/04/2011 at 2:18am - misc - by brownieswillneverbethesame (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out that my neighbors took it upon themselves to knock down the fence we shared, and putting up a new one. Thus fencing my pool into their yard. When I asked them why, he replied, "We thought you weren't coming back." I was gone for 4 months tending to my sister with breast cancer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32910) - you deserved it (1387)
On 09/04/2011 at 2:09am - misc - by Pool-less - United States (Missouri)
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a huge fight. What was it over? He accused me of pronouncing MY name wrong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25418) - you deserved it (2540)
On 09/04/2011 at 1:41am - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my best friend and I were playing Call of Duty, when he said he had to go to the bathroom. Curious, I checked his phone. A text message read, "Tell your friend you're going to the bathroom and come eat. Pizza is here." from his dad. Apparently, I'm not good enough to feed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27825) - you deserved it (5180)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:16am - misc - by Pizza-less - United States (Washington)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
