zeyad4040

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zeyad4040

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1216
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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zeyad4040's FML badges

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zeyad4040's favorite FMLs

Today, I got back from vacation and walked in on my boyfriend and my brother in my bed. FML

by Now Single / 04/03/2011 at 4:06am / Reserved / Intimacy

Today, I gave up my seat on the subway for an elderly man. He thanked me by grabbing my ass. FML

by Groped / 04/01/2011 at 8:45pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, I heard the four most dreaded words known to man during my first time: "Is it in yet?" It was. FML

by Johntheladdo / 03/29/2011 at 1:26pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, as I walked home, I heard the people behind me in an argument over my gender. FML

by Cxisbest / 03/23/2011 at 5:21pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing with my dog. His bouncy ball rolled under the couch, and I got on my hands and knees to get it. He decided it would be a good chance to hump the shit out of me. FML

by Username / 03/23/2011 at 12:21pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him 'meow' over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML

by Fcuked / 03/23/2011 at 12:40am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

Today, at work, a coworker started to tell me about his weekend, without me even asking. Halfway through his story, I started to daydream and lost track of time. Bored, I told him, "Hey man, I'll call you back, I've got to get back to work." Then I remembered I wasn't on the phone. FML

by PFCdavila / 03/22/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2011 at 1:54am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

by failureparent / 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, I was telling my friend how lonely I am on Skype. He responded by deleting me as a friend. FML

by changeddaily / 03/20/2011 at 12:52am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my friends told me that they couldn't make it to my birthday dinner unless I changed the time, because I'd made dinner reservations that would clash with the new episode of Jersey Shore. FML

by Jim / 03/10/2011 at 1:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend did the Austin Powers dance/strip-tease while dancing to 'I Touch Myself'. It was cute until he ripped off his shirt and revealed that he'd shaved his chest hair in the shape of a penis. FML

by Anon / 03/10/2011 at 10:08am / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I auditioned for my school's production of Romeo and Juliet. When they announced that I got the part as Juliet, all the guys auditioning for Romeo suddenly disappeared. FML

by Juliet / 03/10/2011 at 7:36am / Miscellaneous

Today, I auditioned for my school's production of Romeo and Juliet. When they announced that I got the part as Juliet, all the guys auditioning for Romeo suddenly disappeared. FML

by Juliet / 03/10/2011 at 7:36am / Miscellaneous

Today, after setting up surveillance in my front yard to see whose dog keeps crapping on my lawn, I finally caught the culprit on film. It was my heroin addict neighbour. FML

by Tom / 03/10/2011 at 6:09am / Animals