zehbruh

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Offline (the 06/26/2015 at 9:17pm)

zehbruh

2Fucked!

zehbruhzehbruh
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 18 July 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1708
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About zehbruh : If there's anything you want to know just ask :)

zehbruh's page activity

Visits<b>eyepuppy</b> - yesterday at 4:38pm<b>chr1sF</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 8:28pm<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 2:38pm<b>pred8885</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 12:35am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 10:54pm<b>Blodwast</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 2:41am<b>RA91</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 4:59pm<b>bbycks304</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 8:34am<b>Spark_Slicker</b> - the 08/09/2012 at 1:47am<b>jlstough</b> - the 03/18/2012 at 7:39pm<b>qiangqiangsheng</b> - the 02/27/2012 at 10:36pm<b>brick_man33</b> - the 12/20/2011 at 2:02am

Fucked!<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 2:29am<b>RA91</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 11:00pm

zehbruh's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of zehbruh's badges

zehbruh's favorite FMLs

Today, as I finished my piano recital and took a bow, I farted into the microphone. FML

by fartypants / 06/18/2015 at 6:53pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I wore a sleeveless shirt for the first time in years, when I glimpsed something on my shoulder that looked like a spider. I let out a scream that sounded like a donkey having a stroke and flailed my arms. Then I realized it was my tattoo, and that I was freaking out everyone on the bus. FML

by HURP / 06/17/2015 at 11:41am / Canada (Alberta) / Transportation

Today, I was sick, and my voice was really low and raspy. A cute guy smiled at me and said hi, so I said hi too. He looked shocked and said, "Sorry bro, thought you were a girl." I am. FML

by Anonymous / 06/05/2015 at 8:21am / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Love

Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2015 at 11:23am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, my dog was knocked unconscious. I had to race him to the vet and pay a small fortune for x-rays and shots. All because he ran into the kitchen at full speed and smashed headfirst into the refrigerator after hearing me open a bag of turkey. FML

by roadie42 / 05/24/2015 at 11:15pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I stuck my hand out the car window and noticed my arm fat flapping in the wind. FML

by windthroughmyflab / 05/13/2015 at 7:19pm / United States / Health

Today, my Breaking Bad obsessed boyfriend actually used the phrase "I am the one who cocks." during foreplay. My vagina just about turned into a desert on the spot. FML

by SKYYYLLLARRRR!!!! / 02/01/2015 at 11:17am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to use an at-home waxing kit for the first time to get rid of the hair on my upper lip. After experiencing the trauma of waxing, I fell asleep. A few hours later, I woke up to see that I now have acne everywhere I had waxed. I have an acne mustache. FML

by iamamermaid / 01/20/2015 at 1:14am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my cat learned how to open doors. Ever since then she's been running up to my room, opening my door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML

by Apes / 03/25/2013 at 3:18am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend told me his Christmas gift to me was custom made. I told my parents in excitement, thinking it could possibly be a ring. Half an hour later he told me what it was; a molded dildo of his penis. It's going to be an awkward conversation with my parents when they ask what I got. FML

by djl / 12/20/2012 at 12:30am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, on the way out to buy groceries, my boyfriend asked if I'd like him to buy some of my favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in my face. FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2012 at 7:06pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend was dropping me off home and we were still in the car. When I went in to give him a hug, my hand hit his shoulder and I dropped my phone at his feet. Just as I pulled back up with it, my dad was staring at us from outside. He still appears to think I was giving him head. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2012 at 2:20am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML

by shit.... / 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm / Malaysia (Selangor) / Intimacy

Today, my mom called me an asshole. She was embarrassed when she saw that a visiting family member had overheard, and tried to cover it up with, "Honey, you are a casserole! You are just delicious, any guy is gonna want you sweetie!" She honestly thought this would work. FML

by Agirl / 10/25/2012 at 7:44pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and I asked him to call me something sweet. He called me Honey Boo Boo. FML

by TypeOhNegative / 10/22/2012 at 11:18pm / United States (Nevada) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.