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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I got further with a guy than I've ever before. By that, I mean I got his phone number. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43224) - you deserved it (6391)
On 07/08/2009 at 3:28am - misc - by stupiddddddd (woman) - United Kingdom (Rotherham)
Today, the dentist sneezed in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (77450) - you deserved it (3346)
On 07/01/2009 at 2:33am - misc - by kewlio45 - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52324) - you deserved it (26555)
On 06/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Jeweler (man) - United States (California)
Today, I had a bath in the bathroom we are currently renovating. There's a big hole in the middle of the floor. When I got out of the bath, I swung one leg across the gap to get a towel from the rack. I drew back my leg and looked down to see my brother's hot friend staring up at me in horror. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36839) - you deserved it (13870)
On 06/19/2009 at 9:51am - misc - by ilikeirishducks (woman) - Italy
Today, I was at McDonald's and I was going through the drive-thru. As I was driving away, I checked my food and the lady had given me a Night at the Museum Happy Meal toy by mistake. I got so excited that I crashed the car into a pole. I'm 36. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21899) - you deserved it (48628)
On 06/17/2009 at 12:35pm - misc - by NotSoYoung (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML
I agree, your life sucks (77188) - you deserved it (14562)
On 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm - misc - by NoBalls (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, after masturbating in the shower, I heard my phone go off outside the bathroom. After my mom saw me get my phone to check my messages she said "I think you're addicted to that", to which I said "but it feels so good and every guy does it." She was talking about how I text people a lot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9476) - you deserved it (53962)
On 06/07/2009 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Jon (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57283) - you deserved it (5570)
On 06/06/2009 at 7:18am - work - by foretwintie (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, a friend and I went to Gamestop to pick up a game he wanted. I ended up buying a 17+ game, and I was prepared to show my license, but he stopped me an said, "I know you're 18". He then said, "Man, I've pretty much watched you grow up in this store." A game salesman watched me grow up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17202) - you deserved it (43576)
On 05/12/2009 at 7:09am - misc - by Rech (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I found out that the girl I've been dating online for over three months is actually a very bored 14 year old boy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66844) - you deserved it (180374)
On 05/04/2009 at 2:12am - love - by Iman (man) - United States (California)
Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it he said "I don't know what you're talking about Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML
I agree, your life sucks (753814) - you deserved it (63739)
On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)
Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (349255) - you deserved it (23634)
On 02/13/2009 at 10:54am - intimacy - by The Sbeak (man) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (446039) - you deserved it (32715)
On 02/06/2009 at 10:29am - intimacy - by caroline (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11839) - you deserved it (51973)
On 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Boredom - United States
Today, my two year old girl said "motherfucker". Everyone laughed, even her grandparents. Our family is insane. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19868) - you deserved it (5809)
On 12/03/2008 at 11:39pm - kids - by Noname - Sent from mobile version
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