zanguard

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zanguard

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2050
  • Number of comments : 175
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About zanguard : My picture says it all.

zanguard's page activity

Visits<b>Axujsho</b> - the 08/30/2016 at 4:03pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 6:21pm<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 5:33am<b>Frillwee95</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 2:41am<b>scooter165</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 12:46am<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 9:38am<b>Kitten_love</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 11:14pm<b>papygeorges</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 12:10am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 9:30pm<b>GEFStryker</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 4:02am<b>helptheorphans</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 12:48am<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 12:13am<b>Droneman</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 7:22am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 8:23pm<b>oakcrush</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 9:35pm<b>SPN_lover666</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 6:53pm<b>Plastinate</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 6:53am<b>xadeel</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 6:48pm

zanguard's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

zanguard's favorite FMLs

Today, I won a lifetime supply of pineapples. One problem, I'm allergic to pineapples. FML

by dusk / 01/05/2012 at 3:09am / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I jokingly mocked my dad about his age. He jokingly poured milk all over my head. FML

by Kyle / 01/05/2012 at 1:58am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my father decided that since I'm 21 and have never had a girlfriend, he would buy me a book on how to talk to girls. The book is written by a 9-year-old kid. FML

by foreverashamed / 11/04/2011 at 2:57am / Canada / Love

Today, I sent my grandma a naked picture instead of my girlfriend. While attempting to delete it, I sent it again. FML

by me / 11/04/2011 at 12:38am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the cheek at school. I missed, and walked away awkwardly. Later on, a teacher stopped me and told me how bad I failed. FML

by fmlifer / 11/04/2011 at 12:29am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was fired for the second time in as many days. I received a letter notifying me that I would no longer be working for the company, effective immediately. When I did not attend work the next day, I received a phone call firing me for not turning up. FML

by fired / 11/04/2011 at 12:04am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, my mom told my girlfriend an embarrassing story about me, along the lines of whenever my parents would take me school clothes shopping, I'd cry because I hated all the choices they gave me. The most recent incident of this? Last year. I'm 18. FML

by Czechplease / 11/03/2011 at 10:23am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home from school, only to find I was locked out. The cars were all there, but no one was in. It wasn't until I heard continuous banging from my parents' window that it clicked. They locked me out for over an hour in freezing weather just to have sex. FML

by miley098 / 11/02/2011 at 12:37pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, after 3 years, I saw my ex, who I still love, at a coffee shop. Being nice, I said hi. He turned around, looked at me, and said, "Thank God I broke up with you. You look like a hot mess!" before getting up and walking out with his model girlfriend. FML

by brie / 11/02/2011 at 12:01pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, after 3 years, I saw my ex, who I still love, at a coffee shop. Being nice, I said hi. He turned around, looked at me, and said, "Thank God I broke up with you. You look like a hot mess!" before getting up and walking out with his model girlfriend. FML

by brie / 11/02/2011 at 12:01pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was in a rush and had to get changed in a train restroom. While changing, I leaned against the button that opened the door. Not only do train toilet doors open and close very slowly, leaving you half naked for a few seconds, but everyone in the carriage opposite can see clearly. FML

by omgomgomg / 10/27/2011 at 5:41pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, my roommates sent a relationship request to my one night stand with my Facebook account. She accepted, and sent me a long message confessing her love for me. I can't remember her. FML

by birgz / 10/25/2011 at 8:42am / Love

Today, I discovered I have a cyst on my backside. I can't get it removed until Friday. I have to sit through four midterms this week. FML

by Britney / 10/24/2011 at 6:06pm / United States / Health

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

by adieuvelib / 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

by MLGreco / 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm / United States / Kids