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zandalee

Offline (22 hours ago) | Search for a member

zandalee

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2687
  • Number of comments : 1750
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About zandalee : So excited for 2014!!

zandalee's page activity

Visits<b>SaltyJuice</b> - yesterday at 7:12am<b>ostark</b> - yesterday at 7:32pm<b>dragonrider1959</b> - yesterday at 6:54pm<b>biasedshooter</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 9:36am<b>kwgang</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 11:58pm<b>poirot</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 6:25am<b>VengeanceChicken</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 3:40pm<b>reapr03</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 12:42pm<b>orlando2189</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 3:49pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 5:10pm<b>krisnick</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 3:29am<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 6:58pm<b>s3kShUn47</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 5:51pm<b>TheSovietOnion</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 1:51pm<b>persianjr</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 12:37am<b>Way2Fast8</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 12:36am<b>firefox9778</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 2:59am<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 10:39pm

zandalee's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of zandalee's badges

zandalee's favorite FMLs

Today, my vibrator was in another room and I was too lazy to get it. I was also too lazy to do it manually. It's like I've been married to myself for too long. FML

Today, I used a public toilet. After I did my business in the stall and walked out, I was confronted by the sight of a man standing on tip-toes, holding his penis up to the automatic hand-dryer. Doubt I'll get that image out of my head any time soon. FML

#21166318
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46408) - you deserved it (4684)

On 06/07/2014 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by yepintheladiesroom (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML

#21158120
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44188) - you deserved it (8310)

On 05/31/2014 at 11:05am - love - by wendtinmypants (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my teenage daughter tried to convince me that the UK is a part of Canada. After I pulled out a map to prove her wrong, she got all angry and defensive, and said that nobody's perfect at "geometry". My daughter is an idiot. FML

#21122867
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49671) - you deserved it (9937)

On 04/25/2014 at 5:21pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my toddler found my daughter's recorder from 3rd grade and figured out how to play the highest pitch note. Of course, my daughter pulls out her trombone to have a jam session. And I'm out of ibuprofen. FML

#21121712
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35894) - you deserved it (4923)

On 04/24/2014 at 11:28am - kids - by missmom83 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I realized that the only female who shows any sexual interest in me at all is my 70-year-old neighbor. FML

#21113897
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39793) - you deserved it (4167)

On 04/15/2014 at 5:55pm - love - by gerontofuck (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

#21095689
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46942) - you deserved it (11863)

On 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm - misc - by dani (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was texting an artist friend telling her I wanted to buy her paintings; going on and on about how much I wanted it and loved the way they looked and couldn't wait to have them. I realized my phone had corrected paintings to panties. FML

#21091119
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37299) - you deserved it (4948)

On 03/19/2014 at 7:19pm - misc - by BigBlue (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mother thought it would be funny to sneak into my room at night and scream like a demon after I had explained to her how scared I was of the exorcist movie I had just seen. She claims it wasn't her. FML

#21054343
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41725) - you deserved it (5691)

On 02/08/2014 at 12:13pm - misc - by so scared - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my brother came to my first standup comedy act. He'd apparently read my material beforehand, and kept finishing my jokes for me. FML

#21050455
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49249) - you deserved it (4969)

On 02/04/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by DeeDee - Austria (Wien)

Today, my daughter hugged me around the neck and whispered, "I'm going to cut your head off." I'm afraid to go to sleep now. FML

#21043189
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42680) - you deserved it (5226)

On 01/28/2014 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Bahrain (Al Manamah)

Today, I was packing, when my parents told me to put my little sister's toothbrush in the top pocket of their suitcase. The pocket I opened had 3 unopened boxes of condoms in it. We're going to my gran's house, and I'm going to be sleeping on a mattress on the floor of their room. FML

#21040204
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51076) - you deserved it (4724)

On 01/26/2014 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my neighbors called the police and said that they saw, through the window, a suspicious person in my house doing something to my piano. The "suspicious person" was me, in my own house, playing my own piano. FML

#20678725
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42297) - you deserved it (2469)

On 05/21/2013 at 9:57pm - misc - by pianoplayer (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

#20577178
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51175) - you deserved it (5642)

On 04/06/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by confusedcatlover (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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