About zachjack : I'm awesome!
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I spent the entire day at school being called Meg. My name isn't Meg, so I started to get really annoyed and confused. Later, I found out it was because I look like Meg from the show Family Guy. She's known for being unpopular, unwanted, ugly, and stupid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27211) - you deserved it (4476)
On 09/21/2010 at 6:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I found my favorite stuffed animal I had as a child in the trash bin. I took it out to find that it felt wet and smelt funny. Apparently, my younger brother cut a hole in the butt of it and used it to masturbate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42578) - you deserved it (2627)
On 09/21/2010 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24900) - you deserved it (21159)
On 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, my new girlfriend, with whom I have not had sex, showed me her collection of sex toys. She picked up one approximately the size of my forearm and said "This one is my favorite" now I'm scared for her to see me naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34275) - you deserved it (3324)
On 08/27/2010 at 5:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He also decided the best way to end our relationship was to kill me and our virtual child on The Sims 3 by setting us on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31234) - you deserved it (5741)
On 08/19/2010 at 1:26am - love - by Single - United States (California)
Today, I went to bed with three hot, half-naked girls beneath me. I was in the bunk above. Alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28786) - you deserved it (11648)
On 07/27/2010 at 10:43am - intimacy - by lonelyguy321 - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, when my girlfriend woke me up, she said, "I just had the sexiest dream." Thinking she was feeling frisky, I started to try to fool around with her. She pulled away and said, "Well it wasn't about YOU." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28607) - you deserved it (3979)
On 07/25/2010 at 7:09am - intimacy - by girlgirlinsanity (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my boyfriend showed me how he gives himself a semi-erection before he goes into the men's showers after training so his penis will look bigger in front of all the guys. I find it worrying that he won't have sex with me, but has no problem walking around in front of men naked with a semi. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28409) - you deserved it (3108)
On 07/18/2010 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by 4fucksake (woman) - Ireland (Sligo)
Today, I got mugged by someone wearing a bear suit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30054) - you deserved it (3846)
On 06/01/2010 at 7:41pm - misc - by mugged (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was texting my boyfriend during a 7 hour car ride with my family. I thought it'd be fine to text dirty with him. Little did I know, my audio corrector was on, and told me the right way to spell 'penis' and 'orgasm.' 5 hours left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13692) - you deserved it (48456)
On 05/23/2010 at 10:39am - intimacy - by grounded - Sent from mobile version
Today, I learnt that the people I work with dislike me so much that they have a competition to see who can accidentally hurt me the most. How did I find out? A chef poured boiling water over my hands, and another shouted "50 POINTS!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (27203) - you deserved it (4557)
On 03/14/2010 at 5:09am - misc - by Cooky (man) - United Kingdom (Calderdale)
Today, my girlfriend asked me "is it in yet?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19217) - you deserved it (4376)
On 01/14/2010 at 9:06am - intimacy - by anun (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was having passionate sex with my girlfiend of nine months. She's making a lot of noise so I tell her to keep it down and remind her my parents and sister downstairs. A few minutes later I get a text from my sister saying my parents want to make sure I'm wearing a condom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6028) - you deserved it (14711)
On 01/08/2010 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by awskme - Sent from mobile version
Today, I found a camera someone left at our house. I looked at the pictures, and saw my grandma in a sexy outfit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15647) - you deserved it (3873)
On 11/27/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53129) - you deserved it (2696)
On 09/13/2009 at 5:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)
Monday 17 June 2013
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