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Why am I up so early?
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Today, I was asked to crawl through a sun roof because one of my co workers locked her keys in her car. After I got the keys, instead of opening the car door, I climbed back out through the sun roof. To laughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4592) - you deserved it (26474)
On 09/12/2010 at 8:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I awkwardly had to comfort my 32 year old friend when he broke down crying in the middle of a crowded McDonald's. Apparently they no longer serve barbecue bacon cheeseburgers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22175) - you deserved it (2459)
On 09/09/2010 at 3:48am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I had a volleyball game against our rivals. I hit myself in the face with the ball 3 times, fell flat on my face against the court, and later had an asthma attack with no inhaler in sight. We lost the game. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18238) - you deserved it (4435)
On 09/03/2010 at 1:05am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I discovered how my ex-girlfriend exacted her revenge. Every item of clothing I own now has sequins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17361) - you deserved it (8353)
On 08/05/2010 at 1:00pm - love - by Luke - United Kingdom (West Berkshire)
Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for this sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22776) - you deserved it (1769)
On 03/09/2010 at 1:31am - misc - by CreepedOut (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my friend and I went to the park. I bet my friend I could fit into the swing that was sized for toddlers. I managed to fit in, but I couldn't get out. My friend had to call 911 to get me out. When they finally did, the fireman told me that fat ladies shouldn't try stuff like that. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6104) - you deserved it (24224)
On 03/07/2010 at 12:41am - health - by fatlady - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, a friend of mine commented that I "have a lot of confidence for a fat girl". Ummm... thanks? FML
I agree, your life sucks (19375) - you deserved it (2845)
On 02/24/2010 at 8:26pm - misc - by Jill - Sent from mobile version
Today, I brought my new girlfriend over to show off to my family when my senile great-grandmother walked into the room wearing nothing but her underpants asking when the Olympics come on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17857) - you deserved it (1658)
On 02/17/2010 at 2:30am - misc - by unfortunate419 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was late to dinner with my anal-retentive parents because my boyfriend was too busy making cock puppets in the shower to get ready to go. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8638) - you deserved it (1839)
On 02/16/2010 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by tacolove69 - United States (California)
Today, I went to the store to buy a new lego set, only to find there weren't any left in stock. I started crying before I could make it out of the store. Oh, and I'm eighteen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6698) - you deserved it (30385)
On 02/14/2010 at 12:43pm - misc - by Tibblesthepengwin (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)
Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14047) - you deserved it (3833)
On 02/02/2010 at 7:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I started work as the head engineer for a big civil engineering project. I met the rest of my team, in particular the environmental engineer who I'll need to get along with the most. As it turns out, I took her virginity when we were freshmen in college. She still thinks I'm an asshole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8604) - you deserved it (23976)
On 01/25/2010 at 8:32am - love - by CivE (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16267) - you deserved it (2390)
On 01/23/2010 at 11:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was hooking up with a guy I just met. Things were getting hot and heavy and he asked me if I had a condom. I said no, and to which he replied "that's okay, we can just use a sock" and pulled his sock off of his left foot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19169) - you deserved it (3830)
On 01/20/2010 at 1:17am - intimacy - by ilovesocks (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was riding my dorm elevator from the 5th floor to the 1st by myself. Since the elevator is really slow, I pulled my pants and underwear down just for kicks. Just then, the door opened to let a girl on at the 4th floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3254) - you deserved it (57019)
On 01/20/2010 at 12:27am - misc - by embareassed (man) - United States (Ohio)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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