Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About yer_maw : I'm Kirsty [one on the right ;)]
FML gets me through shit days and hangovers.
I like driving badly, drinking dangerous volumes of diet irn bru, having crazy nights out, holidays, my friends, watching scrubs too much and being with Craig ;)
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl when her parents decided to come home early. Trying to run out the back door I fell and broke my ankle. Not only did her former Navy Seal father find out I was banging his little princess, he drove me to the ER, alone. FML
Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML
Today, I was on a job trial at the local pet shop and, naturally, was doing all the disgusting jobs. As I was cleaning the kittens' litter in the cat enclosure, someone thought it would be funny to lock me in there. I sat in a giant cage in the middle of the store with people laughing at me. FML
Friday 28 August 2015