yeldarb12

Search for a member

Offline (the 05/18/2016 at 6:03am)

yeldarb12

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 904
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

yeldarb12's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of yeldarb12's badges

yeldarb12's favorite FMLs

Today, when I tried to break up with my girlfriend of 2 years, she had no idea we were even dating. She thought of all the movies, dinners and "sleep overs" I had with her was because we were such great friends. FML

by K.S.S. / 04/16/2016 at 10:24pm / United States (Indiana) / Love

Today, I asked my husband if he could at least try to give me an orgasm. His response? "Um... why?" FML

by not satisfied / 02/11/2016 at 12:06pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I took a nap on the couch. Apparently, my wife decided to put makeup all over my face as I slept. She didn't tell me until after I went to the gas station to grab some beer. Looks like I will have to find a new place to buy beer from now on. FML

by Sleeping Beauty / 12/19/2015 at 2:20pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my boss fired three of the four other people who were going to work with me on Black Friday in my department. Now it's just me and a new hire. My boss doesn't see a problem. FML

by darksaber522 / 11/25/2015 at 4:40pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I told my parents I don't really like children and probably won't have any in the future. They sat me down and gave me a lecture on how people who hate kids are heartless. FML

by Anonymous / 11/25/2015 at 12:30pm / Switzerland (Fribourg) / Kids

Today, while working at the bar, I accidentally spilled a beer on my chest. Several drunk men whistled and seemed to enjoy what they saw so much that they bought even more drinks and started coming onto me. My boss asked if I could do it again on my next shift. FML

by anon. / 11/17/2015 at 1:34pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a writing assignment back. After meeting with my professor specially after class and meticulously combing through every word of that paper, I got a low D. Turns out, he graded me down on every suggestion of his that I took. FML

by ScreweD- / 11/16/2015 at 4:39pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I tried to give my first hand-job while wearing fuzzy socks in a carpeted room. I reached out to touch his penis and shocked him. FML

by nnniii / 11/15/2015 at 11:55pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, while my husband was at work, he missed our son saying his first word ("Dada"), taking his first steps and smashing the widescreen TV with a well-aimed teddy bear. Care to guess which of these three things made my husband cry. FML

by michelle / 11/15/2015 at 10:21am / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Kids

Today, I got several angry messages on Facebook, demanding to know how I could cheat on my wife. They didn't believe me when I said I had no idea what they meant. Turns out my wife made a sarcastic post about my "new mistress". She was talking about Fallout 4. FML

by FalloutScrolls / 11/13/2015 at 9:49am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend rather stupidly assumed that because my vagina is no longer in use after giving birth, we would automatically start having anal sex. After I loudly explained how that wasn't happening, he then had the nerve to ask for a blowjob before we'd even left the hospital. FML

by anonymous / 11/12/2015 at 7:00pm / Netherlands / Health

Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML

by notyourmummy / 11/12/2015 at 4:09am / United Kingdom (Isle of Wight) / Intimacy

Today, I learned the hard way that my boyfriend lied about getting a vasectomy before we met, in spite of knowing how phobic I am of pregnancy and kids. His defense? "I figured you'd change your mind someday, because all you chicks love babies." FML

by nocongratsneeded / 11/03/2015 at 10:23pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got fired from my dream job. I found out today that the girl who trained me lied and taught me how to do things wrong, so that when she got back from maternity leave, she could get me fired and take her job back. My new coworkers were in on her plan from the beginning. FML

by sabotaged / 11/01/2015 at 7:05pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I decided it was time to have "the talk" with my daughter, after I found a thong in the washing machine. She denied it was hers and pointed out how it was too big to fit her. I ended up having a very different talk with my son. FML

by caroline / 10/29/2015 at 4:02pm / Germany / Kids