yankee_lovrXXo

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yankee_lovrXXo

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1940
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About yankee_lovrXXo : I'm just so friggin hilarious.

yankee_lovrXXo's page activity

Visits<b>charles621</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 1:44am<b>lionheart822</b> - the 02/20/2013 at 11:37pm<b>robbie12321</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 11:50pm<b>stevenJB</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 4:33am<b>SayPeanuts</b> - the 06/01/2012 at 12:57pm<b>armyycadet7</b> - the 08/13/2011 at 8:32pm

yankee_lovrXXo's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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yankee_lovrXXo's favorite FMLs

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

by eun / 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML

by warp_routine / 03/31/2009 at 10:17am / United States (Vermont) / Health

Today, I was talking to my guy friend about prom. I told him I was turned down by 7 guys. So he said "Well, you could always ask me." I then said "Do you want to go to prom with me?" His response was "Nope...now that's 8!" FML

by rejected / 03/27/2009 at 8:38pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I went to confession. I told the priest that I had an intimate relationship with a woman that I'm not married to. He chuckled and said, "You know, lying is a sin too." I wasn't lying. FML

by churchgoer / 03/19/2009 at 11:34pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, the hottest girl in the entire freshman class was telling her friend she was going to Florida for spring break. She said she would be in the same city I would and I couldnt help but say, "Oh, cool! Maybe I'll see you there!" She simply looked at me and said, "I hope not." FML

by evanescence / 03/14/2009 at 8:07pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I went to my guidance counselor and told her how I'd been fascinated with space since I was 12, had read about the universe and everything, and how I want to be an astrologist when I grow up. She stared at me for a second, before saying, "But you're... stupid." FML

by astroloser / 03/07/2009 at 11:10am / Philippines (Rizal) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in the bank with my seven year old daughter, when I saw an old high school friend of mine with his wife. I said hello, and he commented on how beautiful my little girl was. I thanked him, and as I turned away, I heard his wife say "I guess the father must be the good looking one." FML

by lexibabe / 03/02/2009 at 7:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was singing Alicia Keys in the shower and hitting the insanely high notes. My father ran into the bathroom and threw open the shower door, screaming. He thought I was wailing in pain. FML

by legit / 03/02/2009 at 12:22am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got up early and really put some extra effort into my appearance to catch the eye of a cute guy at work. I walked in and the woman that sits in the desk beside me looks over and says, "wow, are you sick? You're not looking too good." FML

by Noname / 02/24/2009 at 6:00pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, I was complaining to my sister about how jealous I was of her looks. Her response was "Sometimes it's okay to be the ugly sister. Like, you have less of a chance of getting raped." FML

by Duckie W / 02/12/2009 at 8:24pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML

by a genius / 02/12/2009 at 8:28am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally unplugged my headphones in the quiet section of the library, causing my music to play from my laptop at full volume. I was listening to Celine Dion. I'm the captain of the football team. FML

by misc / 02/07/2009 at 9:31pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I enjoy reading this site and other people's suffering just to feel better about my own life. FML

by sampaloompy / 01/08/2009 at 3:32am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was eating at a nice restaurant. Feeling curious, I daringly asked for the surprise "Maiden's Dream" dessert. The waiter came back with a banana between two balls of ice-cream on a plate, and no spoon. FML

by sm@rtie / 01/03/2009 at 3:38am / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought "Angus, thongs and perfect snogging" on DVD. FML

by Wickls / 12/18/2008 at 3:30am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous