Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

yankee_lovrXXo

Search for a member

yankee_lovrXXo

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1010
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About yankee_lovrXXo : I'm just so friggin hilarious.

yankee_lovrXXo's page activity

Visits<b>lionheart822</b> - the 02/20/2013 at 11:37pm<b>robbie12321</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 11:50pm<b>stevenJB</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 4:33am<b>SayPeanuts</b> - the 06/01/2012 at 12:57pm<b>armyycadet7</b> - the 08/13/2011 at 8:32pm

yankee_lovrXXo's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of yankee_lovrXXo's badges

yankee_lovrXXo's favorite FMLs

Today, while on vacation, I realized my parents and grandparents had been running off and doing quite a few errands lately. After doing some sleuthing, I discovered they were taking turns having blood-curdling sex in our other hotel room down the hall. FML

#15571420
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24262) - you deserved it (10075)

On 03/31/2011 at 3:20am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, on my 21st birthday, a relative asked me if I was still engaged to the love of my life. The man I spent several years with, gave my virginity to, moved across the country for, who promised to marry me before my 21st, and who swore he was over his ex for good. No, but thanks for asking. FML

#15565101
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34424) - you deserved it (7331)

On 03/30/2011 at 7:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

#15532710
483 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54356) - you deserved it (27338)

On 03/28/2011 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by dickface - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized I've been sinking into a deep depression, ignoring all my friends, and don't know what to do with my life anymore. This is all because I gave up Facebook for lent. FML

#15515343
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15439) - you deserved it (51143)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
404 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48574) - you deserved it (8004)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was playing with my dog. His bouncy ball rolled under the couch, and I got on my hands and knees to get it. He decided it would be a good chance to hump the shit out of me. FML

#15448080
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34414) - you deserved it (10782)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:21pm - animals - by Username - United States (Florida)

Today, at work I had to convince an 80 year old mental patient that she's not Ke$ha and that she really has to put her clothes back on. FML

#15432254
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46890) - you deserved it (4443)

On 03/22/2011 at 2:30pm - work - by Kim - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my wife created a "Points Reward" system for the privilege of sex. 10 points for doing the dishes, 20 for the laundry, etc. How many points do I need before I can have sex with her? 2300. FML

#15430260
699 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70392) - you deserved it (15293)

On 03/22/2011 at 10:59am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend bought several bottles of Potassium Iodine pills and a gas mask, due to the radiation scare from Japan. We live in Texas. FML

#15409356
335 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38614) - you deserved it (6787)

On 03/21/2011 at 12:25am - health - by radiationkillz (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

#15405912
491 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34580) - you deserved it (48557)

On 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm - kids - by failureparent (man) - United States (California)

Today, at my wedding, my brother decided it would be funny to trip me as I was walking down the aisle, in front of hundreds of people. FML

#15395122
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53636) - you deserved it (4124)

On 03/20/2011 at 3:44am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, at the Mommy and Me dance class that I take my four year old daughter to, the instructor had us do a stretch, telling us to pretend we're mermaids. My daughter said to me, "But you're not a mermaid, you're a whale!" FML

#15385688
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37955) - you deserved it (7073)

On 03/19/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Abby_gummibear (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I married a wonderful man. Even though both of us were no longer virgins, we decided to wait until marriage to sleep together. He just told me I was the worst he's ever had. FML

#15133415
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44393) - you deserved it (11754)

On 02/27/2011 at 12:18am - intimacy - by newlywed - United States (Utah)

Today, I ran out of toilet paper in the bathroom. I was forced to use tissues to do the job. As if that wasn't bad enough, the sanitizer in the tissues gave me a rash that made me have to stand up frequently in the lecture hall. Several people asked if I had Tourette's. FML

#15011813
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24701) - you deserved it (3779)

On 02/17/2011 at 1:22am - health - by no more tp -

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because his iPod app said I was cheating. FML

#14797285
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45661) - you deserved it (4918)

On 02/01/2011 at 1:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: