Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

xyadove

Online | Search for a member

xyadove

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1414
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

xyadove's page activity

Visits<b>badlukbryan22</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 7:24am<b>Saywat145</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 9:10am<b>Lutero69</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 6:58am<b>Pstraka6</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 1:30am<b>mimihuseen_</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 6:19pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 6:00pm<b>423</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 5:41pm<b>Blackhawk706</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 1:53am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 9:52am<b>deathposts</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 9:08am<b>abhi5</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 3:19am<b>Retrokitty</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 1:04am<b>martinez121797</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 12:11pm<b>Shorty777</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 7:57am

xyadove's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of xyadove's badges

xyadove's favorite FMLs

Today, my son invited his girlfriend over to our house just to break up with her. Then he asked me to drive her home. So I was then stuck in a car with a bawling teenage girl who lived over twenty minutes away. FML

#16692971
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38441) - you deserved it (5454)

On 06/16/2011 at 9:20am - kids - by Username - United States

Today, I found out all about my son's secret online double life. He's been moonlighting for two years as a male prostitute by the name of Peter Parker. FML

#16611980
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40806) - you deserved it (5126)

On 06/11/2011 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by Mom (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and oil in the food she cooks for me because she wants me to be fatter than her. FML

#16355568
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53240) - you deserved it (3376)

On 05/26/2011 at 10:24am - health - by fatteningmeup (woman) - United States

Today, my wife and I were planning our nursery for our future child. She said that we'd be painting it pink either way. I asked what would happen if we had a boy. She said "Oh, he'll be gay" with a menacing glare. I'm worried. FML

#15804993
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39118) - you deserved it (6359)

On 04/16/2011 at 6:59am - misc - by Worried (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend hid my car keys and decided that she wouldn't give them back until I succeeded in giving her an orgasm. FML

#15689615
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17842) - you deserved it (75076)

On 04/08/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by failure -

Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML

#15678976
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34453) - you deserved it (13159)

On 04/07/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realized I don't know which is sadder: the fact I have detailed conversations with myself in my car, or that I bought a Bluetooth earpiece so that I can do it in public without people thinking I'm a complete lunatic. FML

#15555921
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33515) - you deserved it (24733)

On 03/30/2011 at 12:54am - health - by shelby - United States

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
410 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48772) - you deserved it (8016)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML

#15042917
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50391) - you deserved it (41757)

On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML

#15042917
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50391) - you deserved it (41757)

On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I thought it would be funny to hide behind the ice machine at work and jump out randomly and scare people. This resulted in my first victim whacking me in the head with a skateboard. FML

#14222956
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6114) - you deserved it (55038)

On 12/16/2010 at 10:29am - work - by me -

Today, I arrived home to find my cat dead and note saying, "Sorry, I tripped over him." Not only is my cat dead, but I was robbed by a polite thief. FML

#13841741
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55472) - you deserved it (2706)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, my cat learned how to flush the toilet while I was in the shower. His transformation from cute kitten to pure evil entity is now complete. FML

#13762266
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31227) - you deserved it (5293)

On 11/08/2010 at 5:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, my son stuck coins in our DVD player. It would be cute if he wasn't 25. FML

#13651777
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34335) - you deserved it (5333)

On 10/30/2010 at 4:42pm - kids - by idiot - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I found out that my best friend lost her virginity to my father. Her excuse? She was drunk. His excuse? "She's hot." FML

#13642352
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52116) - you deserved it (3877)

On 10/29/2010 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: