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Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24036) - you deserved it (2769)
On 12/18/2010 at 4:11am - love - by anonymous - United States (South Carolina)
Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I sit next to wafting the smell of their vagina towards themselves and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31824) - you deserved it (2518)
On 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, in art class, we made plaster masks. We were supposed to put Vaseline on our partner's face so the plaster didn't rip their facial hair out. My partner forgot to put it on my eye brows and eye lashes. My face is now completely hairless. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24871) - you deserved it (4657)
On 12/15/2010 at 9:30pm - health - by Charlayyyy -
Today, I went to meet the girl I'd been talking to online for a while, and fallen in love with. When I arrived at her house, my brother answered the door and took a picture of my shocked face. He and his girlfriend had planned the entire thing because I'm apparently the most gullible member of the family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30088) - you deserved it (6833)
On 12/13/2010 at 3:29pm - love - by phonesage (man) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I found out my cousin had moved to Texas. I would have been okay with it, were it not for the fact that not only did I loan him $3,500, but I was supposed to go with him too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17668) - you deserved it (2921)
On 12/13/2010 at 3:29am - money - by Reasondon - United States (Michigan)
Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years, the father of my son, has been the pervert who has been harassing my mother with weird texts and pictures of his knob. The cops told me after we went to the police station to report it and catch the creep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23148) - you deserved it (2316)
On 12/13/2010 at 12:01am - intimacy - by grossed the f out -
Today, I was messing around on my laptop by drawing on the screen with a marker pen. When it came time to clean it off, it wouldn't budge. Now I have a full beard and mustache etched permanently on my computer screen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3969) - you deserved it (75404)
On 12/12/2010 at 2:36pm - misc - by dumbass1991 (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I got married. Tonight, I received the best orgasm of my life. Not from my husband; from the jacuzzi tub in our honeymoon suite, where he was passed out drunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27179) - you deserved it (3414)
On 12/11/2010 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Montana)
Today, without even trying, I convinced my 17-year-old daughter that blueberries are just peas holding their breath. I have raised a complete airhead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27158) - you deserved it (46336)
On 12/11/2010 at 9:44am - kids - by parentfail (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, at a gynecologist's appointment, I was privileged to have 7 co-ed nursing students stare at my vagina for 25 minutes as part of their training. At one point the doctor apologized for having to "open me up more than usual", but said she wanted everyone to get a good view. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33554) - you deserved it (3479)
On 12/10/2010 at 12:09pm - intimacy - by RevolutionLove - United States
Today, for the first time, a good looking guy was in my yoga class. Today also marked the first time I farted during yoga class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21528) - you deserved it (3645)
On 12/10/2010 at 8:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I came home to find my 25 year old boyfriend laughing hysterically at his laptop while he made Microsoft Sam say "feces", "penis", and "diarrhea". FML
I agree, your life sucks (18248) - you deserved it (6612)
On 12/10/2010 at 2:17am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, one my friends died. All my crying gave me a headache, so I asked my boyfriend to bring me some aspirin. My headache didn't go away. Instead, I got diarrhea because my boyfriend gave me laxatives instead of aspirin as a "joke" to cheer me up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42079) - you deserved it (2786)
On 12/09/2010 at 9:23pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I found out that even if you have to go really bad, never burst into a bathroom stall assuming that it's vacant because you don't see any legs underneath. There might be a child in there, who will scream, and whose mother will burst in and start screaming at you for being a "pedo." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19074) - you deserved it (3970)
On 12/08/2010 at 9:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was helping an old lady at my job. While I was in mid-sentence, she coughed wet phlegm directly into my mouth. It tasted vile and caused me to have a panic attack while working. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26584) - you deserved it (1842)
On 12/08/2010 at 9:26pm - work - by grossedout (woman) - United States (California)
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