xs4u

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Offline (the 07/26/2016 at 6:32pm)

xs4u

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 February 1985 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15670
  • Number of comments : 175
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About xs4u : Social media manager. Tech freak. Horror/science fiction/fantasy film/book buff. LOVE anime & a good laugh. ANDROID is the future.

xs4u's page activity

Visits<b>Nevracceptdefeat</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 10:34pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 06/29/2016 at 6:45am<b>Varieus</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 2:16pm<b>jacqui_matznick</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 1:16pm<b>uhhitsmegan</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 2:15pm<b>pwagner014</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 11:21pm<b>Malteser95</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 7:01am<b>FatedB</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 12:18am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 5:01pm<b>jazmin3012</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 1:02am<b>alexissage</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 9:55pm<b>Toutejulie</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 5:50pm<b>christian2234</b> - the 12/19/2013 at 4:09pm<b>Allennis44</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 6:26pm<b>joea21</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 5:47pm<b>907nispel</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 4:46pm<b>Sp4de</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 7:14am<b>magicdrummer47</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 1:12am

Fucked!<b>jacqui_matznick</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 7:16pm

xs4u's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of xs4u's badges

xs4u's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up hungover and with $13 stuffed in my bra. I'm not a stripper, and I'm not sure how it got there, but that's the most money I've had on me in weeks. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2014 at 12:47pm / United States (Connecticut) / Money

Today, my boyfriend told me that sometimes my nipples taste like onions. FML

by Snufflopagus / 01/01/2014 at 8:26am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text message. Every 20 minutes or so, I'll get a notification that I have a new message, and I check it just to find that same message sitting there. I'm being trolled by my own phone. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2014 at 2:49am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I tried to time my ejaculation to happen right as the new year started. FML

by Lonesome / 01/01/2014 at 1:41am / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy

Today, my 11 month-old son started viciously biting whatever part of my anatomy he can sink his teeth into. He thinks it is hysterical to latch on while I scream helplessly in pain for him to let go. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2014 at 12:38am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I decided to light a lantern and watch it fly with my girlfriend after midnight. The neighbor's tree caught fire. FML

by claubea11 / 01/01/2014 at 12:17am / Puerto Rico / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife got so drunk she kissed another guy when the ball dropped. FML

by dantko / 01/01/2014 at 12:04am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, instead of spending New Year's Eve having a romantic night out with my fiancé as we'd planned, I'm spending it sitting beside him in the hospital because his friends convinced him to go off-road ghost-riding in the dead of night. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2013 at 6:38pm / Love

Today, I was watching TV with my husband, and he started getting frisky. When the commercial break started, we started having sex. When he came, there were still two commercials left before the show resumed. FML

by erjazo / 12/31/2013 at 4:19pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time. The first thing he did was show me a bullet, then he basically said that if I don't submit to his daughter's every whim, that bullet will end my life. FML

by thisisavirus.exe / 12/31/2013 at 3:57pm / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I introduced my dad, who is a surgeon, to the TV show House. I thought it'd be a good bonding experience. How wrong I was. He spent the whole time yelling about the "insane" medical inaccuracies, then lectured me about my crappy taste in TV. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2013 at 3:11pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried waxing for the first time. At first it felt like I'd dipped my balls in a furnace. Now I can't even feel them. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2013 at 2:36pm / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Intimacy

Today, I was at work alone with a stomach bug. For some reason, our bathroom was out of toilet paper, so I had to quickly run to the nearest store to buy more, only to shit my pants midway there. I'm pretty sure the cashier knew exactly what had happened. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2013 at 1:22pm / United States (Alabama) / Work

Today, I was dressing in front of my boyfriend. He was looking at me in wonder and I assumed this was a good thing. Then he muttered, "God damn, you're awkwardly shaped." FML

by awkword / 12/31/2013 at 12:47pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I went outside at 9am in my boxer shorts to get my mail in my garden. I'd put a shoe in the door to keep the door jammed open, but when I ran back, my dog had the shoe in his mouth and all the doors and windows were closed. FML

by gnafron / 12/31/2013 at 6:30am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Animals