About xs4u : Social media manager. Tech freak. Horror/science fiction/fantasy film/book buff. LOVE anime & a good laugh. ANDROID is the future.
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
xs4u's favorite FMLs
Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML
by Anonymous / 12/08/2013 at 3:39pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by blah! / 12/08/2013 at 8:19am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids
by ashsaunde / 12/08/2013 at 1:58am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by ballplaya52 / 12/08/2013 at 12:04am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was babysitting my barely-pubescent cousins, and they started talking about giving blowjobs to their "boyfriends". When I got mad at them and told them they shouldn't be thinking of that stuff, they said I was just pissed 'cause I haven't gotten laid. FML
by bella / 12/07/2013 at 8:07pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, I found out that I take long enough showers for my boyfriend to sleep with my sister and put everything back to normal before I get out. I found out when I needed more shampoo that was in a shopping bag in my room. FML
by mystery / 12/07/2013 at 4:55pm / United States (North Dakota) / Intimacy
by :^( / 12/07/2013 at 12:30pm / Bahrain (Madinat) / Health
by eer004 / 12/07/2013 at 5:06am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by Anonymous / 12/07/2013 at 2:17am / United States (California) / Work
by jessierules93 / 12/07/2013 at 12:58am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, a customer threatened to come back later and shoot the whole place up. Why? I didn't give him a discount on his beer. My boss's reaction when I called the police: "Why didn't you give him the discount?!" Last week he bitched me out for letting a girl off for being a few cents short on hers. FML
by eat my fucking ass, boss / 12/06/2013 at 6:37pm / Australia (Victoria) / Work
Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML
by Anonymous / 12/06/2013 at 4:37pm / United States (New Mexico) / Intimacy
by oh / 12/06/2013 at 4:20pm / Denmark (Midtjylland) / Miscellaneous
by fuckadaisical / 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm / United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff) / Intimacy
Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML
by Anonymous / 12/06/2013 at 1:15pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous