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xopher425

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xopher425

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 23 April 1975 (39 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 804
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About xopher425 : Some days your life is fucked, some days you deserve it. But most of the time you deserve your fucked up life.

xopher425's page activity

Visits<b>BBlah</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 12:42am<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 10:41am<b>cassiecassie559</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 5:29pm<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:19pm<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 11:08pm<b>Tim2415</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:40pm<b>davidpropert</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 10:35pm<b>poppppojs</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 8:03pm<b>thegreatericmoor</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 1:37am<b>Jurnee1011</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 7:05pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 2:52am<b>Bubule</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 12:37pm<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 3:36pm<b>kkkkkkkkkka</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 2:13am<b>EdaPanda</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 2:31am<b>vanessuhm</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 11:05pm<b>tacomonkey</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 9:59pm<b>casafudge</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 6:23pm

xopher425's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of xopher425's badges

xopher425's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents accused me of being secretive. I have no idea what they're talking about; all I do is work, go to school, sleep, and eat. Now I'm grounded until I tell them what's going on. I have crazy parents, that's what's going on. FML

#21242846
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38886) - you deserved it (2453)

On 08/22/2014 at 12:09am - misc - by up to no-good... - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I had some painful gas at work, so I tried to silently ease it out. It was silent all right; silent, and so deadly that someone exclaimed, "What the fuck?!" My coworkers traced it back to me. Now they're all pointing their mini desk fans in my direction to make a point. FML

#21241122
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35607) - you deserved it (9810)

On 08/19/2014 at 5:54pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39549) - you deserved it (5611)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, I had to awkwardly grab my pink dildo after my husband's friend asked what it was that my dog was chewing on. FML

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37273) - you deserved it (22838)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML

#21211381
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36148) - you deserved it (17557)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm - misc - by happypineapple - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML

#21207892
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40456) - you deserved it (5798)

On 07/13/2014 at 12:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while sitting on my front porch, my cat came up beside me. I started idly stroking her, only to turn and realize I was petting a wild raccoon. FML

#21206318
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43263) - you deserved it (7913)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:38pm - animals - by and god shat (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out my son has a new hobby after seeing a picture on the internet: putting realistic-looking stickers of spiders at the bottom of my coffee mugs. My wife was scared half to death this morning after downing a cup of coffee and then glancing the cup's bottom. FML

#21139841
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36294) - you deserved it (4288)

On 05/14/2014 at 4:58pm - kids - by itwasathtebottomofmycoffeemug (man) - United States (California)

Today, my wife got all excited when she saw the elevator we were in had a feature to make it go sideways. I didn't have the heart to tell her they were the buttons to open and close the door. FML

#21137819
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46572) - you deserved it (6074)

On 05/12/2014 at 3:41pm - misc - by Jarool - Canada (Alberta)

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

#21133982
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63575) - you deserved it (8082)

On 05/08/2014 at 9:55am - love - by STOP (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my art teacher showed off a painting of his name he got in Japan. I can read Japanese, and it actually says "Old idiot". I really don't want to break it to him. FML

#21130223
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45147) - you deserved it (4733)

On 05/04/2014 at 2:12am - misc - by Sam (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I farted so loudly I not only woke myself up, but my husband as well. He mistook my gas for someone trying to break in and insisted on checking the whole house. I was too embarrassed to tell him the truth. FML

#21125262
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41705) - you deserved it (8505)

On 04/28/2014 at 12:58pm - misc - by gassymomma (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, after years of marriage and my lazy husband letting himself go, I can now finish a bottle of wine and still be sober. This means I've built immunity to the last thing that can make me want to have sex with him. FML

#21119490
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48626) - you deserved it (12923)

On 04/21/2014 at 11:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



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