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xlorawrz

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xlorawrz
  • Town/Country : England
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 22 April 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 693
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About xlorawrz : I'm not good at writing these, so...
Bye.

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xlorawrz's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on the subway head bobbing to my favorite track when the guy across from me gets up, punches me in the face and says, "Don't nod at my wife like that." FML

#19113390
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26247) - you deserved it (3298)

On 02/19/2012 at 6:17am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I pulled into a parking lot and waited for a car to back out so I could take their spot. The apparently batshit insane psychopath in the other car managed to completely overlook me waving him out, and backed straight into my car. FML

#19002086
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16742) - you deserved it (4310)

On 02/05/2012 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and eating a burger. Feeling frisky, I sat up and took off my shirt. He looked at my chest, at his burger, then back at me and said, "Give me a minute, I don't want my food to get cold." FML

#18896901
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14278) - you deserved it (27020)

On 01/24/2012 at 3:50am - intimacy - by elisimo - United States (New York)

Today, I accidentally called my teacher "Babe". FML

#18734147
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27523) - you deserved it (12310)

On 01/07/2012 at 9:12am - misc - by randomgirl - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I am 8 weeks pregnant. I have debilitating 'morning sickness' all day. And now I get to add peeing my pants every time I throw up. FML

#18734137
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23367) - you deserved it (4163)

On 01/07/2012 at 9:07am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the last few seconds of my 2011 was spent staring at my drunk, naked uncle pouring olive oil over himself and rubbing it in. FML

#18670300
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26413) - you deserved it (2970)

On 01/01/2012 at 1:18am - misc - by Scarred4Life - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was screaming at my neighbor to shut his dog up. After 30 minutes of bellowing, he yelled back that it was my dog that was barking. He was right. FML

#18622052
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6274) - you deserved it (45679)

On 12/27/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Yo mom - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML

#18358033
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61041) - you deserved it (2880)

On 11/26/2011 at 4:54pm - love - by notsohappilyeverafter - United States (California)

Today, while working at my local supermarket, a customer threw a turkey at me because we "should have bigger ones." FML

Today, my upstairs neighbor was leaving the parking lot, and stopped to wave. I smiled and waved back, only to realize that she was saying goodbye to her cat, who was sitting in the window. FML

#17966931
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19469) - you deserved it (2991)

On 10/12/2011 at 11:41am - animals - by octoberrain - United States

Today, I found out it takes no special training to put a large glass marble up my nostril but may require someone with a medical degree to remove it. FML

#17965139
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4937) - you deserved it (41382)

On 10/12/2011 at 1:09am - misc - by Beaky (woman) - Canada

Today, after being admitted to the emergency room for severe abdominal pain, my boyfriend shouted out in front of my parents, "At least she isn't pregnant!" FML

#17959837
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23028) - you deserved it (2803)

On 10/11/2011 at 1:43pm - health - by letmedienow - United States

Today, to show that he really wanted me to shave myself, my boyfriend pretended to go down on me, but instead of following through, he stuck a wad of gum in my pubic hair and got back up. FML

#17789200
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25907) - you deserved it (34493) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/20/2011 at 5:20pm - intimacy - by Prinpette - France

Today, I had my buddies over for a few beers and, trying to be cool, I told my wife to get out of the living room and back in the kitchen. I felt smug, right up until she said, "Why? Your mom doesn't need to be turned over for another 20 minutes, dick." FML

#15052365
392 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6862) - you deserved it (93405)

On 02/20/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by :/ - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML

#15042917
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47889) - you deserved it (40066)

On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)



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Thursday 10 April 2014

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