Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2439
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

xlittlemiss's page activity

Visits<b>Arjunt</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 1:08pm

xlittlemiss's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

xlittlemiss's favorite FMLs

Today, I sat on the kitchen counter in my boxers for ten minutes running my feet under hot water. Why? Because my dad thought it would be funny to superglue my feet together. FML

by lucas / 12/12/2011 at 1:38am / United States (Alaska) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2011 at 6:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, we had a sprint race in gym class which I wasn't looking forward to because I'm a little chubby. The race started and I shot off as fast as I could, somehow in the lead. Everyone was cheering. When I was nearing the finish line I turned around, only to see the race hadn't started yet. FML

by dan / 11/18/2011 at 11:54pm / Reserved / Miscellaneous

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

by possiblyoverweight / 11/08/2011 at 9:01am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Kids

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

by Mini-wanker / 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML

by southernluxe / 09/04/2011 at 5:36am / United States / Intimacy

Today, just after waking up, I caught a glimpse of my girlfriend in the mirror. Not knowing I was awake, she sniffed at her armpits, started gagging, then quietly came back to bed. FML

by Harry Dare / 09/02/2011 at 12:31pm / United Kingdom (Walsall) / Love

Today, at work, my boss stared at me from behind while I made hand gestures and noises at a toaster. I was pretending to be Magneto. FML

by dragos_dgt / 09/02/2011 at 3:48am / Romania (Bucuresti) / Work

Today, I was baking cookies. I stared at them for 15 minutes and finally asked my dad, "Why are these taking so long?" He looked up at the oven and replied, "It might help if you turn the oven on." FML

by Kendal / 08/23/2011 at 2:18pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, send all the prisoners to a desert for 5 years and give them a gun to fight over. And then he'd surgically attach child molesters' penises to their foreheads. FML

by Andrew / 08/23/2011 at 10:46am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my mom gave me the "birds and the bees" talk, while she was taking a dump. FML

by KidCudi227 / 07/19/2011 at 1:42am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that my wife is such a bitch normally, she's actually nicer when she is on her period. FML

by Username / 07/09/2011 at 12:32am / United States / Love

Today, I woke up in a panic to what sounded like a plane about to crash into my house. I was so scared, I peed myself and passed out. It was just my cell phone vibrating under my pillow. FML

by esoog / 05/19/2011 at 1:38pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML

by coldwetnose / 05/09/2011 at 2:08am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I realized the only reason I chose to lose weight is that I can never cross the crosswalk fast enough. FML

by Username / 05/03/2011 at 3:51pm / United States (Washington) / Health