xlcowboylx

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xlcowboylx

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xlcowboylx
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 June 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 558
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About xlcowboylx : College student, individual, skeptic, critical thinker and gamer. That pretty much sums me up at the moment I think.

xlcowboylx's page activity

Visits<b>Huzlers</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 12:51pm<b>josiemijn</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 6:58pm<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 2:58am<b>caspergirl17</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 8:49pm<b>brim826</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 3:15pm<b>spork_of_doom</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 12:01pm<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 12:36am<b>StarDust5921</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 10:20pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 4:42am<b>king_of_LA</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 12:05am<b>InnocentMalice</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 6:01am<b>LunaaBluee</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 12:50am<b>Cupcake040</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 10:22pm<b>rach0545</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 10:05pm<b>saocrates</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 3:35pm<b>frankiero</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 1:32pm<b>elmatador615</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 1:18am<b>carl_CIOwhat</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 5:05pm

Fucked!<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 7:27am

xlcowboylx's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of xlcowboylx's badges

xlcowboylx's favorite FMLs

Today, I was mugged while changing my tampon. The mugger took everything, including the fresh tampon. FML

by BroadcitySF / 02/27/2016 at 10:42pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sexting my boss. I realised that I wasn't texting my boyfriend after I'd sent 2 nudes, and received many sexually provocative responses. FML

by Peter Steele love / 10/17/2015 at 8:49pm / United Kingdom (North Somerset) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend of a month told me that the only thing keeping her from swallowing a bottle of pills is being in a relationship with me, because she doesn't handle breakups well. FML

by cherokeems / 03/26/2015 at 1:44pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2014 at 11:30am / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous

Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML

by AndrewKeane / 06/09/2014 at 12:26pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

by STOP / 05/08/2014 at 9:55am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my dad and I got into an argument. When I was proven wrong, he said, "Good job, genius." I shot back the first thing that popped into my head, which was "I am not a genius!" He laughed and says that if I die before him, he's having that engraved on my tombstone. FML

by Anonymous / 04/25/2014 at 5:42pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that most teenagers would rather grab free candy from the broken vending machine than help the guy stuck underneath it get free. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2014 at 12:05am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother-in-law called me every 2 hours, starting at 8pm and stopping at 10am the following morning. She says that since my wife and I are expecting our first child, I should "get used to waking up at all hours." She calls my work phone, which I'm not allowed to switch off. FML

by dope_mcfly / 01/29/2014 at 11:55am / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins and had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML

by nicholascageonyourface / 06/09/2013 at 1:13am / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous

Today, for the first time ever, a woman saw my penis. I am 30 years old. The woman was my doctor. She snorted to cover a laugh and apologized. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2009 at 5:40pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, my tampon string was hanging from my bathing suit. My boyfriend thought it was a thread hanging from my bikini bottom. He publicly pulled out my tampon. FML

by rebekah / 04/03/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

by konens_dick / 03/22/2009 at 6:38am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy