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Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Mobility
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I was so baked out of my mind that I argued with my parakeet over who farted. I could be wrong, but I think I lost the argument. Worse still, my boyfriend had been standing in the doorway long enough to hear everything, even me farting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5760) - you deserved it (24894)
On 04/04/2012 at 12:14pm - misc - by woohoo420 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21599) - you deserved it (2184)
On 03/15/2012 at 7:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was re-watching my wedding video. As I was walking down the aisle, you could hear my grandfather mutter "Here comes the bride, all fat and wide." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29040) - you deserved it (3933)
On 03/10/2012 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)
Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17870) - you deserved it (38123)
On 03/10/2012 at 2:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17305) - you deserved it (16226)
On 03/10/2012 at 1:50am - misc - by starboy - United States (California)
Today, I had to patiently listen as a customer nattered on and on about how incompetent I was for not stocking the movie she was looking for. It took nearly 20 minutes to get her to calm down long enough for me to explain that there is no such movie as "Hobbits With Shotguns". FML
I agree, your life sucks (18898) - you deserved it (1598)
On 03/09/2012 at 5:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I decided to take a peek in my fiancé's vow book to see how far he's got. The only thing in there was the lyrics to a song from the movie Shrek. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7955) - you deserved it (16162)
On 02/25/2012 at 11:09pm - misc - by KMO - United States
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10522) - you deserved it (26997)
On 02/23/2012 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my dad was complaining about how he makes so little money, so I suggested he invent something. The first thing that came to his mind was an automatic animal masturbator. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18489) - you deserved it (2607)
On 02/21/2012 at 10:43pm - intimacy - by nothowtheydoitinalabama - United States (Oregon)
Today, I made a drunken bet with friends that I could pour lighter fluid on my hands, light it, and shake it out before I got burned. I lost. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4850) - you deserved it (43671)
On 01/27/2012 at 1:48am - health - by batsu (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I went to the gas station, paid the clerk, and drove off without pumping any gas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10160) - you deserved it (29175)
On 01/26/2012 at 11:46pm - money - by ChevRooon - United States
Today, I was walking home when an old guy came up to me asking for directions. After I pointed him in the right direction, he held my hand, stroked my face then pushed me into a bush. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21643) - you deserved it (2170)
On 01/24/2012 at 6:47am - misc - by SpongeAbii2 - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)
Today, I realized the universal beauty that can be found in a pancake. I'm not sure if I have reached spiritual enlightenment, or if I should have my head examined. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12768) - you deserved it (4848)
On 01/23/2012 at 6:27am - health - by Dutchee - Netherlands (Friesland)
Today, my father introduced me to his new girlfriend. She could have passed for my little sister, or even worse, my daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24852) - you deserved it (1619)
On 01/22/2012 at 4:26pm - love - by Laura (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was working at Staples and organizing some notebooks. All of a sudden, I jumped up because of a sharp pain in my back. A little girl had grabbed a stapler and stapled my back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30975) - you deserved it (1610)
On 01/22/2012 at 12:09am - kids - by thosedamnkids (man) - United States (New York)
Monday 20 May 2013
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