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About xdearie : uh. yeah. (:
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was told by 'Seventeen' to add liquid highlighter to my foundation for an all-over glow. Little did I know that liquid highlighter is an actual makeup product. I now have an awful rash due to applying the ink from a highlighter pen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4927) - you deserved it (58213)
On 12/26/2009 at 11:18am - health - by rtrim29 (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was unloading things into a hotel. As I went to get a bag out in the hallway, the room door closed and I had no key. When I knocked and asked my family to let me back in, no one answered. The doors are clearly not soundproof. I could hear them debating whether or not to let me back in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17628) - you deserved it (2625)
On 12/25/2009 at 8:50pm - misc - by RoxahTheGreat (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23192) - you deserved it (5207)
On 12/25/2009 at 11:15am - kids - by BathroomMuch (man) - United States (California)
Today, my mother confronted me about my bird's masturbation problem. We spent christmas eve googling "bird masturbating" and watching videos to see if that was actually what my bird was doing. At least he's having a good christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16479) - you deserved it (2093)
On 12/25/2009 at 1:25am - animals - by suuuuuupucci (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of 'Fight Club'. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18853) - you deserved it (8710)
On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I took my car through the car wash. I got bored, so turned the radio on, forgetting that the aerial/antenna on the car is automatic. My car aerial is now bent at a 90 degree angle and about to fall off. The radio is half white noise, half stuff that may or may not be free jazz jam sessions. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4589) - you deserved it (20941)
On 10/28/2009 at 6:14am - misc - by ohsnap (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend who had just been awakened by her own fart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54407) - you deserved it (3534)
On 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by P0wned (man) - France (Bretagne)
Today, I was at lunch with my girlfriend. The waitress came up and asked for her number, then asked if she had a significant other. I laughed as my girlfriend gave the waitress her number. They're going on a date, tonight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35687) - you deserved it (4774)
On 09/29/2009 at 3:09pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5920) - you deserved it (73546)
On 09/16/2009 at 1:05pm - kids - by Mac - Sent from mobile version
Today, I got rejected for approximately the tenth credit card I've applied for, I called a bank to find out why. Apparently I took out a car loan in 2004 and bought a house in 2006. I was 13 in 2004. The credit report does not have any records of this. Thank you identity theft. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37098) - you deserved it (1391)
On 09/15/2009 at 3:24pm - money - by Lost (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was hanging out with my best friend. I have been getting these random explicit texts and phone calls so I just joking said to my friend, "I think someone wrote my number on a bathroom stall." At which point he said, "Sorry, I didn't think people really called those numbers." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30974) - you deserved it (2180)
On 09/13/2009 at 11:57am - misc - by Casden (man) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I realised that the man who I wanted to be with, the man who wanted to be with me, and my husband were three different people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34040) - you deserved it (16830)
On 09/13/2009 at 5:27am - love - by sunburychick (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I went to a salon. As soon as I walked in, someone ran to me and inspected my hair and said, "We can fix this." I was there to get my daughter's hair done. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23984) - you deserved it (4115)
On 09/12/2009 at 11:12pm - misc - by badhair (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I finally worked up the nerve to text the girl I've had a crush on to ask her on a date. I got back the reply, "Error message 3265: Number No Longer In Swrvice." Not only can she not spell, when I looked it up, "error 3265" doesn't even exist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60409) - you deserved it (5902)
On 08/17/2009 at 5:41pm - love - by ZSL (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I ran into my new apartment neighbor. She said she could hear me and my girlfriend having wild sex last night. She told me she had always wanted to have a threesome. My new neighbor is as old as my grandma, and even resembles her. I politely declined. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40068) - you deserved it (4009)
On 08/08/2009 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by pear8head (man) - United States (Minnesota)
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