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xavier1623

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xavier1623
  • Town/Country : Singapore, Singapore
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 May 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 495
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About xavier1623 : Nothing much. Just prepare to be reversed stalked if you're on my page. And FML gives us a badge for doing creepy things like that too! ^^

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xavier1623's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the doctor for a sore throat. The doctor wasn't wearing any shoes. He said that he doesn't believe in pharmaceuticals and that it's 'all about vitamins', and he gave me a flyer for a vitamin mail order company. Then he showed me photos of his holidays. FML

#16232810
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27283) - you deserved it (3663)

On 05/18/2011 at 12:38am - health - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML

#16205540
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59364) - you deserved it (9353)

On 05/16/2011 at 12:33pm - health - by Bobby M - Ireland (Carlow)

Today, I was sitting on the bus following a harrowing breakup. A boy of no more than 6 looked at me full of compassion and said, "Are you crying because you're ugly?" FML

#16116610
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40924) - you deserved it (5218) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/10/2011 at 10:56am - kids - by Hahapasdroleleptit - France

Today, my husband got out of the shower, came downstairs naked screaming ''EMBRACE THE HARDNESS!!'' Little did he know, my step mother was sitting right there at the kitchen table. FML

#15934305
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42377) - you deserved it (5388)

On 04/26/2011 at 1:28pm - intimacy - by Scarlett - United States (Washington)

Today, I was dry-walling a house when my butt started to itch. I bent over to scratch it on a piece of plywood, at which point the client's wife walked in and asked what the fuck I was doing. FML

#14892103
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7609) - you deserved it (25868)

On 02/08/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Shane -

Today, I was taking a leak in the mall bathroom. A kid no older than thirteen strolled in and paused next to me at the urinals. He took one look and laughed, "I feel sorry for your wife, man." All I could do was stand there as he casually disappeared into one of the stalls. FML

#14330687
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33184) - you deserved it (3815)

On 12/25/2010 at 2:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my 6 year old son learned that if you give a mouse a cookie, he will ask for a glass of milk. But if you give a hamster a cookie, he will try to shove the whole thing in his mouth, choke, and die. FML

#5868589
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40019) - you deserved it (4296)

On 10/17/2009 at 5:08pm - kids - by hamster cookie - Sent from mobile version

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

#5550225
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60688) - you deserved it (4413)

On 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by P0wned (man) - France (Bretagne)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend humping my stuffed rabbit. I thought he was trying to be funny until I saw that he had an erection. FML

#4570183
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55092) - you deserved it (4092)

On 08/16/2009 at 9:58am - intimacy - by bunny (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML

#3232657
685 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75721) - you deserved it (15337)

On 06/26/2009 at 3:57am - misc - by ILuvYouSoldiers (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wanted me as she pulled closer and closer. Eventually she pulled me in and licked my ear lobe sensually. She then said, "I wanna break your collar bone." in a seductive tone. FML

#1681747
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57907) - you deserved it (6718)

On 05/06/2009 at 12:13am - love - by Jinthebar (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "you know, I am looking RIGHT at you," FML

#1592701
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20740) - you deserved it (78256)

On 05/03/2009 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by danggit3290 (woman) - United States (California)



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