About xavier1623 : Nothing much. Just prepare to be reversed stalked if you're on my page. And FML gives us a badge for doing creepy things like that too! ^^
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29368) - you deserved it (3955)
On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)
Today, my mom was convinced that the lawn gnomes we bought from Wal-Mart were secretly conspiring to kill us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23584) - you deserved it (2472)
On 08/16/2011 at 2:52am - misc - by Stevie - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my girlfriend of 4 years broke up with me. She took everything, including the kidney I gave her a year ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48872) - you deserved it (4292)
On 08/09/2011 at 10:50am - love - by aliixmaee - United States
Today, I arrived at the beach for a week's vacation. I walk on the beach only to find they are "rebuilding" it. They have heavy machinery all over the place, they work 24/7, and this only happens every 15 years. Glad I picked this week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19295) - you deserved it (2234)
On 08/07/2011 at 3:22am - misc - by me - United States
Today, while watching tv at my mother's house, a tornado warning came across the screen. After being in the dark nasty basement for half an hour, my mom realizes she was watching a recorded show, and that tornado warning was for 2 weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25791) - you deserved it (3338)
On 08/07/2011 at 1:29am - misc - by cargaljen - United States (Missouri)
Today, I went to Walmart to get some acne cream. As I approached the register, I looked in my wallet for the money. The cashier saw that I didn't have enough money, and before I could say anything, he goes "Just take it, I've never seen anyone who needs it that much!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32689) - you deserved it (2862)
On 08/07/2011 at 12:40am - misc - by Taylor D - United States (Virginia)
Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28527) - you deserved it (2520)
On 08/06/2011 at 7:37pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46826) - you deserved it (7159)
On 07/15/2011 at 12:24am - animals - by flipnazn - United States (Texas)
Today, I shaved my beard off. Turns out the skin under my beard is six shades lighter than the rest of my face. I look completely ridiculous. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32090) - you deserved it (9754)
On 07/06/2011 at 12:59pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted to spice up our sex life, so we went and had sex in the park. We had 30 minutes of "spice", just to spend seven hours in jail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10822) - you deserved it (32831)
On 07/02/2011 at 11:01pm - intimacy - by T-Guy (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31853) - you deserved it (2760)
On 06/14/2011 at 1:56pm - misc - by ugh - United States (Louisiana)
Today, while driving in a funeral procession I was distracted, missed my turn and yelled "God dammit!" I'm the funeral director; the Priest was in the car with me as I led the funeral the wrong way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11188) - you deserved it (25901)
On 06/14/2011 at 10:23am - work - by patrickalamo - United States (Texas)
Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend "Actually, its a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48752) - you deserved it (3087)
On 06/13/2011 at 5:11am - misc - by Bechara (man) - Pakistan (Punjab)
Today, my mum's boyfriend came back from a job up-state. He is now walking around the house in boxers to "show off his tan". He has a beer gut and a hairy back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25948) - you deserved it (2671)
On 06/13/2011 at 4:58am - misc - by disgusteddaughter (woman) - Australia
Today, I ran over a chipmunk. On my bike. Its mangled carcass got caught in the spokes and decided to join me on my ride. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21689) - you deserved it (8345)
On 06/13/2011 at 12:22am - misc - by cycler - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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