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xZoeAmethystx

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xZoeAmethystx
  • Town/Country : you want to stalk me, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 4 March 1997 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 528
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About xZoeAmethystx : Well hello there random person I've never met! One day I will send you eargasmic songs though your radio,thus music is everything to me. My favorite bands are(in no real order)Blood on the Dancefloor(don't judge,I'm no Scene Queen so hold the attitude,dude), Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Mariiii..(not going to finish that ,I'm no Spooky kid),Jack off Jill,Snow white's poison bite,Taking back Sunday,Bowling for Soup(random I know) and Southern Death Cult(yes I know they have been done since the '80s). So yes ,I'm
a black rainbow of colours. How controversial.

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xZoeAmethystx's favorite FMLs

Today, I had planned to break up with my overbearing girlfriend. She went into complete denial mode, bought me a pair of oversized sunglasses and tomorrow we're going ice-skating. Kill me now. FML

#20947052
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39329) - you deserved it (9569)

On 11/05/2013 at 9:53pm - love - by Trapped. (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML

#20942077
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49578) - you deserved it (4413)

On 11/02/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by SantaClaus - United States (California)

Today, the kid next to me asked me, in all seriousness, if gay people have feelings like regular people. I'm gay, and I have to sit next to this barnacle until June. FML

#20929195
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44559) - you deserved it (7567)

On 10/21/2013 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

#20862305
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51696) - you deserved it (5347)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States

Today, I came home from work to find white fabric and crystals all over the apartment floor. I followed the trail of destruction to my bedroom, where my roommate had left our closet door open. Apparently, her cats decided that my wedding gown was to be their newest conquest. FML

#20762512
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47287) - you deserved it (3063)

On 07/03/2013 at 10:40pm - animals - by nakedweddingday (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was going to buy me a "magic wand". Being a Harry Potter fanatic, I assumed he meant a replica wand. It turns out he actually meant a Magic Wand vibrator. I was more excited about the HP wand. FML

#20758994
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42616) - you deserved it (8489)

On 07/01/2013 at 11:37pm - intimacy - by whorecrux (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, in history class, we were talking about Ancient Rome, and what childbirth would have been like back then. One girl asked in all seriousness why they didn't use ultrasound machines to see what sex their babies were. I have to deal with people like this on a daily basis. FML

#20398310
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21186) - you deserved it (1121)

On 12/13/2012 at 6:44pm - misc - by surrounded by dumbfucks (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was out drinking with some friends in a Safeway parking lot, when I saw a familiar-looking vehicle pull up beside us. It was my dad, who angrily got out and demanded that I come home. I'm twenty-four, and now the laughingstock of my social circle. FML

Today, I had my eyebrows waxed for my senior pictures. After manhandling me, the cosmetologist managed to "accidentally" take my whole eyebrow off. It looks like I'll be remembered forevermore as the girl with one eyebrow. FML

#19987412
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19096) - you deserved it (2594)

On 07/27/2012 at 1:46pm - misc - by booo - United States (Nevada)

Today, my neighbors are moving. As we were saying our goodbyes, their 12-year-old son approached and thanked me for the times I forgot to shut the blinds and he watched me change. FML

#19945004
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15004) - you deserved it (24149)

On 07/16/2012 at 10:38am - kids - by oops123 (woman) - United States

Today, I told my friend over the phone that I had to go drop the kids off at the pool. She told me that she didn't need to know about my bathroom habits and hung up on me. I really had to take my children to the local swimming pool for swim lessons. FML

#19844489
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16531) - you deserved it (1769)

On 06/25/2012 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

#19734981
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24472) - you deserved it (2608)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm - animals - by Scared (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, a lady told me her husband had sinus surgery. I replied, "Oh, I know someone who just had that done." I then realized I meant Alexis on The Real Housewives of the OC. FML

#19404446
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4848) - you deserved it (16604)

On 04/03/2012 at 11:53pm - misc - by gaagaa - United States

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

#19215354
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27178) - you deserved it (3629)

On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my mother looked me dead in the face and said, "I have failed as a parent." FML

#18286632
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30565) - you deserved it (6218)

On 11/19/2011 at 2:47am - love - by Yeoman (man) - New Zealand (Waikato)



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