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  • Number of visits : 466
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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xXx_trickyninja's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.


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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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xXx_trickyninja's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter brought her new boyfriend over for dinner. I realize now why she said we would get along great: we graduated high school together. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2012 at 8:10pm / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2012 at 12:30pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try something new. I ended up tied to the bed, and my girlfriend discovered how ticklish I am. Worst 3 hours of my life. FML

by me / 11/30/2011 at 1:43am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy

Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML

by immy504 / 11/30/2011 at 12:39am / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he suddenly pulls out and says, "Pull my penis." So I pulled his penis and he farted. Then he started doing it again. FML

by halloweed / 11/16/2011 at 12:27am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML

by Margo / 11/15/2011 at 10:16am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, I have done enough trials to confirm that I puke after each time I have sex. FML

by unlucky / 11/13/2011 at 12:19am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend came to my house crying because the guy who she has been cheating on me with doesn't want to be with her anymore. FML

by oink401 / 11/05/2011 at 11:40am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

by KayleeXLoVe21 / 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML

by Anonymous / 11/03/2011 at 3:29am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

by steve-o / 11/02/2011 at 1:06am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I heard a notification on my iPhone. I thought nothing of it until we were done, and then I checked it out. My mom had posted on my Facebook, telling me that if I didn't keep it down, she was going to come up to my room. FML

by ugadawgs09 / 11/02/2011 at 12:32am / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, my fiancé and I got married. We both promised to remain abstinent until our wedding day. She's on her period. FML

by Andrew / 10/31/2011 at 12:04am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, while trying to get my phone to charge, I shoved in the cable harder and harder and tried to wobble it so my phone would charge. After snapping the USB input from the force, I saw the plug was switched off. FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2011 at 9:34pm / United Kingdom (Poole) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home from work to my 3 year old daughter sniffing the rug in the living room. When I asked her what she was doing she said "Daddy smell this." So I went, got on my knees and bent down to smell it and she pushed my face in the dog crap smeared in the rug. FML

by me / 10/22/2011 at 10:06pm / United States (Maine) / Kids