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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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xMaddy_t

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xMaddy_t
  • Town/Country : Bartlett, US
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 5 March 1994 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 138
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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xMaddy_t's favorite FMLs

Today, as a prank, a friend and I tied a 10 dollar bill to a fishing line, and yanked it away from people as they reached for it. It was going really well until one of our victims pulled a knife and chased us around the block. FML

#16144015 (169)

I agree, your life sucks (10082) - you deserved it (38243)

On 05/12/2011 at 1:53pm - misc - by Jackassed - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered that the demonic voice that made me nearly piss myself all night, was my sister's Furby she stuck in the closet. FML

#15219004 (206)

I agree, your life sucks (29388) - you deserved it (5212)

On 03/06/2011 at 2:38pm - misc - by Spooked (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

#14512160 (458)

I agree, your life sucks (55250) - you deserved it (2620)

On 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was sitting on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy came and sat next to me. Next thing I know, he farts loudly, then proudly looks my way. I stared back in shock. He says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML

#13697892 (214)

I agree, your life sucks (46031) - you deserved it (9597)

On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML

#4679110 (350)

I agree, your life sucks (35429) - you deserved it (99709)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to be a diplomat, I slowly say "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

#618013 (863)

I agree, your life sucks (45396) - you deserved it (372692)

On 03/26/2009 at 3:19am - misc - by Tourist (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

#503348 (861)

I agree, your life sucks (37638) - you deserved it (431089)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

#481631 (540)

I agree, your life sucks (255638) - you deserved it (35247)

On 03/20/2009 at 12:15am - kids - by ScoobieDoo (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

#361047 (1080)

I agree, your life sucks (414424) - you deserved it (248666)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by KAAALIS (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids." I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

#185328 (469)

I agree, your life sucks (28753) - you deserved it (339179)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by PicturePerfect (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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