wuciwug

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wuciwug

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 3 March 1985 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 602
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About wuciwug : Always look on the bright side of life... whistle whistle

wuciwug's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of wuciwug's badges

wuciwug's favorite FMLs

Today, I was debating with my now ex-boyfriend over the ethics of using torture in interrogations of suspected criminals. It took just ten minutes before he freely admitted that he'd have no problem "torturing the shit" out of me if he even suspected I was seeing another man. FML

by what the actual fuck / 08/11/2012 at 12:38pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, my girlfriend, who I've loved and dated for over a year, confessed that she's actually straight as an arrow. All this time, she's basically been using me as an accessory to enhance her "social status" and make her guy friends horny. FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2012 at 6:06pm / Thailand (Krung Thep) / Love

Today, I went to an amusement park with a group of friends, one of whom was a girl I really like. When we got on the roller coaster, I was ecstatic that she wanted to sit next to me. Not even half-way through, I ended up puking all over the both of us. FML

by Darth Vomitus / 08/10/2012 at 2:54pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I went out with a friend to grab some food and we were served by this really cute and fun waiter. Stepping out of my comfort zone and deciding to do something crazy, I left my phone number on the bill. I got home only to realize that I forgot to pay the bill. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2012 at 7:39am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my wife yelled at me for admitting I take my wedding ring off at work. I explained that I work in a chemistry lab and don't want to damage it. She laughed and said, "Oh please, that chemistry stuff is nonsense anyway." All while reading her horoscope. FML

by Dumbfounded / 08/08/2012 at 7:03pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I found out that just because you express mail something, it doesn't mean the post office won't still lose it. What did they lose? My signed marriage license. We spent all that time and money to get married on the day of our choosing, and our marriage isn't even valid. FML

by mishkaroni / 08/08/2012 at 3:26pm / United States (California) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, it's my girlfriend's birthday. To celebrate, I spent the day with her and then took her out to a really nice dinner. She is currently giving me the silent treatment because I didn't write "happy birthday" on her Facebook wall. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2012 at 1:15pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I was at a Chinese buffet, and I got a fortune cookie. I opened it, and it said, "The love of your life is sitting across from you". The only thing across from me was an empty chair. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2012 at 4:13pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I found out why I can't sleep at night. My wife switched my sleep aid pills with energy pills. FML

by Blackfell / 08/07/2012 at 1:59pm / United States / Love

Today, I discovered that I sometimes talk in my sleep. After spending an amazing, perfectly romantic night with my boyfriend, I woke up to him telling me to leave. I have no idea what I could have said. He still won't talk to me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2012 at 10:49am / United States / Love

Today, I called in to my girlfriend's favorite radio station to propose. After spending what seemed like an eternity telling her how much I love her and I want to spend the rest of my life with her, she took a deep breath, said, "How about no?" and hung up. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2012 at 3:50pm / United States / Love

Today, my girlfriend's parents took pictures of my tattoos to make sure I'm "not affiliated with any gangs." I have never even been arrested. FML

by awkwardparents / 08/06/2012 at 4:13am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me he was a vampire. I burst out in laughter and said he was ridiculous. He looked at me in disgust and said he couldn't be with someone who didn't trust and believe in him. I'm now single. FML

by shastadoe / 08/06/2012 at 2:37am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my fiancée said that our relationship is doomed because an astrologer said so. We only have a few more days until our wedding and she won't listen to a word I say. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2012 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my fiancé told me that he was having second thoughts on our engagement. Instead of just calling it off, he took me to a fancy restaurant and took a public poll on whether we should get married. The majority said no. FML

by exfiancee / 08/05/2012 at 9:20am / United States (South Carolina) / Love