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wokawokanomnom

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wokawokanomnom

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 8 December 1991 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 637
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About wokawokanomnom : Currently goin to sac state to become a cop and i go on fmls to laugh at how stupid a lot of people can be

wokawokanomnom's page activity

Visits<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 6:39pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 1:37pm<b>maggieisbatman</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 11:07am<b>silon5</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 4:00pm<b>FuhrerBurg</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 4:12pm<b>chadwj</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 2:38am<b>RootedPumpkin</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 11:34am<b>Movel</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 12:44pm<b>cnator</b> - the 12/10/2012 at 6:06pm<b>zombiegold</b> - the 01/24/2012 at 9:09am<b>jesbar95</b> - the 11/13/2011 at 11:40am<b>geon_olam</b> - the 11/03/2011 at 7:42pm

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It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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wokawokanomnom's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56366) - you deserved it (6675)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML

#20777956
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45200) - you deserved it (5906)

On 07/12/2013 at 4:27pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went fishing with my dad. I figured, since we were out on the dock, I may as well get rid of my farmer's tan. I fell asleep in the sun and woke up to a fishing net draped over me. I now have a fishnet pattern down the front of my body. FML

#20730236
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39159) - you deserved it (11171)

On 06/16/2013 at 9:39pm - misc - by jhughes1997 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at McDonald's. As I left the counter with the food, I heard the cashier mutter, "Fat ass." I turned around and demanded to see the manager. Once he came and heard the situation, he looked at me and said, "Well, it's not like he's wrong, right?" FML

#20561915
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37410) - you deserved it (17425)

On 03/27/2013 at 1:04am - health - by first time at McDonald's in months... - United States

Today, I heard an owl near my house. I got excited, as they are not common in the area, and I listened intently to try and locate the source of the sound. After a few minutes, I realized I was not listening to an owl, but to my mother's sex noises. FML

#20480168
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45644) - you deserved it (4737)

On 01/26/2013 at 6:50pm - intimacy - by movingout - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after giving my mother and my girlfriend their Christmas presents, I realized just how similar they looked both in box size and wrapping paper. I noticed after my mother gasped upon finding a vibrator in her box. FML

#20420433
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18115) - you deserved it (50117)

On 12/25/2012 at 2:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the highly intoxicated singer of my band decided it would be a wonderful idea to squat down and take a shit on stage in the middle of a gig. FML

#20408486
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36977) - you deserved it (4263)

On 12/20/2012 at 3:16am - misc - by dudeyouarefired -

Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained ankle both on my right side, resulting in me limping and keeping my arm awkwardly plastered to my side. My fiancé keeps walking like me and calling me Igor, saying "Yes, Master" whenever I ask him for something. FML

#20406767
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29083) - you deserved it (3540)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:16am - health - by Igor (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

#20406748
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33075) - you deserved it (19029)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ayye_its_nikki - United States (Texas)

Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML

#20174027
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22304) - you deserved it (1518)

On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

#20172584
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7312) - you deserved it (32271)

On 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by nekkidness (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my friend showed me a video of me in a nightclub. I was holding two Skittles vodka shots and shouting, "Red and green, merry Kwanzaa!" The shots were yellow and purple. I can't remember that night at all. FML

Today, whilst in an argument with my girlfriend, I told her she was the craziest bitch I'd ever met. She responded with "Challenge accepted." I'm now terrified. FML

#20139786
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10214) - you deserved it (40562)

On 10/30/2012 at 2:08am - love - by Andrew (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend noticed that I looked upset and asked me what was wrong. I told her I was sexually frustrated. Her response? "What are you telling me for?" FML

#20055368
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26950) - you deserved it (5008)

On 09/03/2012 at 5:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was feeling depressed and got very, very drunk. This evening, I was feeling equally desperate, and ended up having to get my special dildo removed from my asshole at the hospital. FML

#20051425
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11909) - you deserved it (35095)

On 08/31/2012 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by pride? what's that? :( (woman) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)



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